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Niko cannot even's picture
on October 30, 2020 - 3:21pm

i feel empty, devoid
i wish i didn't feel stuck in this dark 'place'
i wish i wasn't falling into the void,

time is moving to fast,
i wish i could slow down
how many opportunities have i missed?
days wasted, wasting, away
maybe i could stop time, keep myself like this forever

i could carve all the words i wish i had said out of my throat
maybe someone would listen then
i wish i could feel,
maybe if i just let myself slip someone would understand
i want to claw my way out of the void,
i want to succumb and fall into the voids grasp

i
want
to
make
it
stop

clawing at my throat trying to free the words that are stuck
my throat is an abyss
the words i never say are lost
there is no search party,
because no one knew they were even there

my body is a shell,
and i am a ghost
merely doing what i have to
so no one will notice me
but i want, need, them to notice me
i fear i will waste away to dust,
i already am
i feel my mind go numb
my limbs grow cold
my tongue repeats the same thing over and over
i'm fine
i'm fine
i'm fine
i'm fucked