Skip directly to content

pinup -formerly renewade-'s blog

[{"parent":{"title":"Get on the list!","body":" Get updates from My Chemical Romance ","field_newsletter_id":"6388094","field_label_list_id":"6518500","field_display_rates":"0","field_preview_mode":"false","field_lbox_height":"","field_lbox_width":"","field_toaster_timeout":"100000000","field_toaster_position":"From Bottom","field_turnkey_height":"500","field_mailing_list_params_toast":"&autoreply=no","field_mailing_list_params_se":"&autoreply=no"}}]
Syndicate content
pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
more killjoy stuff

since we're all expanding our stories a bit (or a lot) maybe i should talk about somethings that i mentioned but didn't go into too much detail on. Specifically, Star Dirt.

My sister.
Everything I know comes from what Dr. D remembers being told, by her sometimes, but mostly by... well, you'll find out.
After she left for the zones four, five years ago, she was mostly solo. one of the first things she got was a car. nobody knows how, but she did. it was a Scarecrow's car, and that makes it especially odd. Scarecrow cars are... they're not like the cars you usually get in the zones.

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
pinup's origin story since we're doing this

so. my "origin" story, huh? you really wanna hear it?
it's not that cool; it's actually kind of... well, you'll get it.

my older sister left for the zones in the middle of the night, when i was maybe nine or ten. we went to bed one night and the next morning, she was gone. poof. the one thing she left me was a box. just a little box, for a cassette tape. she crammed a note and a little polaroid picture in there, along with the tape she left. that's all that's left of her now.
the note didn't say too much, just that she was leaving for the zones, not to come after her until i understood why

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
@ corona: excuse me could you pls leave

my school just canceled
for the rest of the year

im bummed
i was really looking forward to going back two weeks from now

this also means (most likely) no more band practice.
that's what im most upset about.
no more band practice for a while.
im crushed, we had just started practicing some really really really awesome songs for HB (2nd band)

it sucks
this corona thing sucks
i hope its over soon

although, i'll have time to record some songs, so that's exciting

during the class facetime call tomorrow, im gonna be sitting outside and wear sunglasses and drink tea through a striped straw, looking

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture

im just tryna listen to mcr to cheer up and spotify be out here like "lol, whats a good mood? imma throw EVERY SINGLE SAD MCR SONG AT U"

so far i've had
-all the angles live demo
-the end
-the kids from yesterday
-i dont love you
and now disenchanted


(i really am lol)

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
by starlight

i've been basking in the glow of a new-born star
the shrouds clouded my view
and it's just beginning to warm up

you know, if you really want to warm up
you must light your own star
but you don't need to do it alone

maybe i should specify:
the new-born starlight i've been basking comes from a star of my own creation

i collapsed
couldn't take it anymore
and under the weight
i forged a core of fire and flame
gathering and curating a collection
pieces from when i couldn't take it anymore
reminders of where i come from
what i have gone through

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
just thought i'd share this


(i didn't make this, i just found it and thought i'd share)

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
more stuff ab corona

my school just shut down
no school for a couple weeks (i go back like, four days before my b-day so lol) so imma be on here a lot

the coronavirus is really freaky
and, i know this will probably get ignored
i thought i would try to clear some stuff up about the virus, mostly the stuff about it being a flu.
its not.
The CDC (2020)(the centers for disease control and prevention, in the us) says in their article, summarizing the coronavirus situation, that "Coronaviruses are a large family of viruses that are common in people and many different species of animals, including camels, cattle,

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
.UNTITLED and not quite completed but as close as it ever will be.

my thoughts are like dust
"it's better to burn out than it is to rust"
but i've only just started to glow
my art rushes from me in a steady flow
i wish i could sleep
the words i say won't make you weep
my skin is weak
my clothes are cheap
i wish i could just be forgotten
i am a fruit and it is rotten
these words feel fake
smashing fists against wall, cake
slides down; an ode to destruction
and production
take the bait
love and hate
is the truth what i seek
the years are long and i am weak
please take care of your soul
mine is broken and cold
the lies of time
are the truest crime
maybe i'll

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
so its official

im sure you all are a bit tired of hearing about this, but its official

pinup -formerly renewade-'s picture
final sode

this is the final broadcast from me, pinup, covering nightshift for doctor death-defying.
its everything from the box he told me to pull music out of
its all the greetings and updates i didn't get to use

it was fun while it lasted killjoys
i'll miss it a lot

Here are all the places you can listen to it:

thank you so so so much for your support

pinup, over