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lostn'foundagain's picture
on February 24, 2016 - 9:03am

Just a little update here.
Getting the email notification from the site saying the little Gerard Way figurines were on sale kinda got my spirits up; then I realized I have no money... so fuck... My sis told me she bought me one at Hot Topic during Christmas time, but those gifts still haven't been shipped out. .-. ah well. I have enough crap gathered in my room. Speaking of, I have this Red Line trick bike I'm looking to sell!! It's in great condition, custom black and green paint job, the brakes work! The reason I'm selling it is so I can get a new Alternator for my car .-. they're about $200.... and that's what I'm hoping to get for the bike.... but I highly doubt I'll get that much.... oh well... one can dream, right!?
Anyways! Things between my love and I are going swell <3 We hit a rough patch going 90 over the weekend, but we're recovering! We held on and we're getting through this... It was all my fault, actually... He's been friends with his ex forever... and I found out they were still talking and got jealous... I'm still a bit ">.>" about the whole situation, but there's not much I can do about it... So! I'm ignoring it! Hoping it'll go away from the back of my head! v.v *sighs* Anyone that knew me last year might understand why I'm so weirded out and uncomfortable with this situation. Remember Aaron, guys? Yeah... that guy fucked me up.. bad.. Serious trust issues now. I had a massive panic attack last Wednesday... Couldn't breathe... couldn't even see... it was really bad... and my love didn't know what to do... I scared him... bad. Cause afterwards, I was just.. numb. I didn't feel anything at all afterwards, you know how that is, right? After an episode like that, you lose all feeling and become a veggie. Well, he thought that I meant I had lost feeling for HIM. Thought I didn't love him anymore, which sparked a whole new panic attack where after I didn't even want to move... and when he went to bed, I stayed up and... well... I relapsed into a bad habit.... BUT! I haven't done that since Wednesday/Thursday! It was a lapse in my self-control, and I'm not planning on letting it happen again!
NOW FOR HAPPY STUFF! I HAVE COFFEE!!!! And I feel really cute this week! Monday, I wore this pretty light white/blue jean dress and a black flower crown <3 Today, I'm wearing my skeleton leggings with an overly large black shirt with a skull in the middle made of cats <3 Oh! And Pigtails! I'm going to do my makeup here in a few minutes, I'm going goth today, since I went pastel Monday <3
I hope you all are having a great day and listening to great music..