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im hopeing everyone see's this.....

after monday i might be getting rid of internet....

my dad left....and my mom cant support us and pay all these bills alone.... so we are going to be shutting off the internet if he doesnt come back by monday

the thing is...i kind of dont want him to come back.....=[



pray for me....please....even those of you who have no god...pray to a fucking squirel that everything turns out ok.......please.....

well religous or agnostic please pray to god.....not a squirell...

i love you family....but i may have to leave you.....
remember me

ahhhh! get over it already!!!

my parents have been mopeing around the house not speaking to eachother since sunday>_<

mom has slept on the coutch all week so far =[

i wish they would get the hell over whatever there problem is because they are realy making me feel depressed and alone.....=[
it kind of funny because i dont think dad realises just how mean he can be sometimes

he is walking around the house with this lost puppy look on his face like he just wants a hugXD

oh well he deserves it i guess....he is so mean to me and mom sometimes >_<

conversations ^^

me: what happens when the world ends? i mean you guys beleive that whole armageton war thing right? what if it happens tonight...what happens to me? what happens to you?!

friend: i dont know, im not god!

me: of cousre not! so you dont even know>_<

other friend: wait what?

me:they beleive that god will have this war against all the evil stuff like in narnia...when aslan fights the white witch or whatever....

friend: yepp...

other friend: narnia? wow

me: oh and can you guys realy not get blood transfusions?


me: O.O

friend: thats what the bible says....


in my current mindset as a conspiracy theorist

i am currently veiwing a certain religion as a cult....and a member of said religion is also a lover of MCR

her mom has made her stop listening to them...i believe that the reason for her not listening to MCR is the fact that they empower free thinking

wich apperently is the devils handiwork to them.....

ok im going to go be violently sick, and then cry myself to sleep


no shit for being religous ok? im not here to convert the non beleiver or whatever
Matther 7:1 judge not that ye be not judged

<---my life principle

but i met this kid recently...she is a jehovas wittness.....note that i am a conspiracy i anylise everything and i take it too far sometimes but with this idk what to do!
it has me so terrified!

i always ask about her religion because im truly interested! and she always tells me i will think its stupid or something!

and when we tallk about anything to do with church she walks away like she is too good to hear it...but i found out changed

i feel
this song
this band

i mean MCR and 30STM are my fav...but i love this song!

and the video!! ah
it is nickelbacks save me video but my god it is amazing with this! i want to make it into a book or album concept....


i was trying to tell someone something today when they randomly go
'your eyes are blue! theyre so pretty! you have realy pretty blue eyes!'

all i could do was
*smile* thanks....?

it realy made my day....

im sory that this is turning into a rant but im terrified that my bandmate is getting herself into a cult =[


i already blogged this...thinking you guys would understand that war would be pretty much just flagging the video......obviously not

this is the internet guys
we cant hurt him
if we could i wouldnt want to
i just want all of his little 'war' videos down curticy of the mcrmy

so i have flagged the guys should go flag it as well

want to go to war my fellow army?

theese are the fuckshits who cyberbullied our FAMILY into attemted suicide!
i say we give them what they want!


war as in flagging his video on youtube for sure we could get the video's taken down......what violent thing could we possibly do on the internet?! honestly i just want the videos down


i think @system_snyper would way 'what is this fuckery?!' or something

and thats how i feel


im feeling pretty alone.....i realy want to be with someone

i wish my friends would call or text.....oh well

the song 'im just a kid' or something describes me

'i woke up it was seven
i waited till' eleven just to figure out that noone would call
i think i've got alot of friends but i don't hear from them
whats another night all alone...'

thats pretty much how i feel right now

i have lost all my friends that i wanted to care about....the kids i hang out with now are pretty annoying
i don't feel accepted
there is one person who i enjoy hanging out with
i feel pretty miserable

if anyone wants