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When you love someone but it goes to waste

worst feeling ever huh? i literally feel my chest burning and i find it hard to breathe. But i know this person is having a harder time.. so ill just try to.. suck it in. btw.. to anyone out there that has a broken heart.. doesnt matter how much it hurts right now.. i swear things DO get better. even if it seems impossible. Theres a song i really like.. its called "Running in the rain" by Hinder. The chorus goes like:
"Wait, I know your hearts been shattered
But there's someone worth the wait
There's so much more that matters
And I know you will be alright, just try
to love the little things

Homophobia...

Ughhhh so im talking to one of my friends and hes like "Hey you know theres gonna be a gay guy in our class?" and im like "...yeah.. so?" and OH MY FREAKING GOD HE SAID: "like.. thats so gross. what if he likes me or.. i dont know ugh.. gross" WHAT THE HELL?!?! so i freaked out and screamed at him and.. UGH im not gay but it pisses me off when people judge them! its SO childish! i cant believe this guy is my friend.. and now hes like trying to talk about other stuff but i dont wanna talk to him right now.. im so mad. hes so ignorant...

You keep crying till you cannot see at all, cannot breathe at all♬

today is one of those days when life isnt as pretty... ☹ and the worst part is that i know its my fault.. see, i always end up hurting the people i love.. damn it -.- now i just hope i can move on.. (look on the bright side) i have amazing friends and i know theyll help me c: anyway.. how was your day killjoys? (: i hope everythings okay ♥

Flashback o_o

this is one of those days when you just cant stop thinking about the past o: not that its a bad thing, i like memories.. but these hurt x) how the hell can i erase them from my mind?

Ö! you remember?!

gguuuuyyysssssss!! i just remembered how this site was before danger days! i was checking my messages (cuz i have nothing else to do :P) and i see myself welcoming SO many new users! and i thought.. how did i know they were new? and i freaking remembered! on the right side of the page we had a little box, it said who was online and if they were new soldiers! and the likes on facebook xD remember? remember? :D some of you must remember!

Surgery! *faints*

I have a surgery tomorrow! And im super nervous! eeeek! Hagleinduhibevygalsitwoflydia.5inkobdu!!The only good thing about it is that after it ill get to see my dad for like 30minutes... Thatll be great ^^ and after the surgery i have 3 exams! O_O Super important exams! If i dont pass them ill die e__e okay, i wont die but omg i dont know what im gonna do. I wish i could talk to my boyfriend or to my best friend. But i dont know where they are .-. & i was like 'ok.

I stole this :D (is that a ...manatee?)

[1] Are you bi?
Nono

[2] Where was your Facebook profile picture taken?
My room x)

[3] What is your middle name?
*skip this question*

[4] Do you have a crush?
I have a boyfriend c:

[5] Does your crush(ill add boyfriend) like you back?
Yeah ^^

[6] What is your current mood?
Im.. im bored (cant you tell?)

[7] What are you looking forward to?
nothing in particular

[8] What makes you happy?
MCR, my pets, my friends & Josh <3

[9] Look at a poster in your room, who's on it?
i took them off :/ but i have lyrics & quotes written on my wall :D (all MCR)

[10] What are you not looking forward to?

Rant in ...3...2...1... *RUN!* -you DONT wanna read this-

FUCK. thats all im saying right now. literally. just FUCK FUCK FUCK. im just so tired... my 4 best friends are on vacations, so i cant really talk with them that much, i mean, we talk via msn facebook & all that but its not the same. they cant come & hug me and wipe my tears off.. god i miss them so much. & AGAIN im sick. and when im sick things get SO ugly. ive been hallucinating and its terrible.

Just... huh.. i dont know ._. its called "Always" ...

its not really a poem but... meh, it was 3:00am and i couldnt sleep.. so yeah..its very different from what i usually write.. considering the fact that all of my poems have the words "blood, suffering, sorrow, tears or razors" in them x) so yeah.. im new on this. You cant make fun of me! :D *pretty pleaseee* okok here i go (:
"I slowly let my walls down as i get closer to you.
i reach of your hand. you hold me tight.
i hear you breathing heavily as your lips taste mine
Feeling your touch reminds me that Im alive.
That everything will be alright
Your warm breath surrounds my neck.

That awkward moment when...

You keep hurting the people you love because youre stupid and selfish. *sigh* i hate myself sometimes...

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