Don't get me wrong I love my friends, they're practically all I have, but when you're the one who has to sit back and watch as they fall in love, or find something that makes them overly happy, and for some odd fucking reason you can't, well lets just say it's hard to be supportive. I want to smile and laugh with them over something their boyfriend or girlfriend did and I do but I don't mean it. I guess I'm a shoulder to cry on and really fucking easy to talk to, because everyone comes to ME with THEIR shit!
Well, kinda. I'm not in prison, and he's more of stalker than a killer. But it's almost as horrible. My stalker (I'm not gunna release any names(Chase Lee, Denver CO 80016)) is a childmolester, and he's probably going to JuV for it. In my opinion he deserves to go but that's just me. (Another reason why I'm happy I scare people) I scared him into staying 10 feet away from me its great! Anyway I just thought that I should let eveeryone in the worl know that there is a childmolester on the lose.
I had my audition for DSA (Denver School of the Arts) audition on Saturday, (Jan. 21 2012) and I thought that it went pretty well, ya know? People where complementing me and all that shit. (FYI: the audition process is: You audition, you see if you get a callback, if you do you have a high chance of getting in, if not you aren't in. period.) Today, (Jan 24, 2012) the callbacks for the Theatre major where posted. (the major I was hoping to get into) So I checked the website and I didn't see my name.
This isn't to get pity.
DSA was my only chance of getting out of the hellhole school I'm in
I have finally realized that you can never really stop loving My Chem. My proof for this is that my closest friend started to fall in love with this other band and they're great don't get me wrong but because of it we didn't really talk to each other that much anymore. Then yesterday I get a text from her and it states: I've fallen back in love with My Chemical Romance again, then again I don't think I ever stopped loving them and their music I just thought I did." I feel like I got a friend back, I mean we met because of MCR.
What's the downside of throwing away your fears? You'd be surprised at how many people come up with excuses to stay scared. But why? Now, I understand that sometimes, not being scared is hard, but fear (along with almost any other emotion) is an illusion. For example, I used to be deathly afraid of heights, then one day these jerks from school wouldn't stop chasing me, the only way out was climbing a tree. Being scared of the height gave me a black eye and a broken nose, I realized then that fears could kill you. And, they really can.
I was watching House earlier today, and the episode was about a blogger who blogged about her life, her current situation, everything. I started to get a little worried. She sounded a lot like me.... I just need to know, do I come off as an attention hog or someone who needs a random group of people's feed-back on my life?
I absolutely, wholeheartedly, entirely, LOATHE Valentines Day! It is the worst holiday anyone could have ever invented! At Liberty, it's even worse. They give out these stupid chocolate roses and chocolate hearts, and the damn Preps get more than you can count. Never in my life have I gotten anything for Valentines Day. And I'm doubtful, that I ever will.... I know that I'll never get one of those chocolate roses, or chocolate hearts. The Preps say that its because I'm not pretty enough. I hate Valentines Day.
I was talking with one of my friends the other day and we where talking about the worst way to die. She said drowning and I said Spontaneous Combustion. I mean, just randomly bursting into flames, not cool. You don't even have time to scream. One minute you're there, you burst into flames, and you're gone. WTF?!
You realize that you can't even trace, and that everyone you hangout with are AMAZING artists. Sure, I write but that's just about it. Sometimes I look at my friends' artwork and wonder, "Why am I the only one in my friend circle that can't draw?" It really ticks me off, ya know?