Jessieateyourbabies's blog

if i see another spam blog, im going to go to that person's house and imma bust out my flexi ruler and beat them senseless! okay, im not really that mad, but they're getting really annoying. i thought there was no spam here! i just felt i had mention that.
Now, something important! So, as some of you know, i haven't been singing. Well, because of my best guy friend, who said, ''wow, you're like, really good at singing!'', and those who told me to forget my mom and do what i love, i have offically regained my confedince. I was singing S.I.N.G in math class when he said that. then the next day in french, i was listening to my mp3 player (im too poor for an ipod) and singing very quietly to either MSI or Linkin Park, when he said "you're really good at singing." and thus, the era of quietness was over! but there's still the lead in the play that makes me feel not as good. but screw her. so, now the house is once agan filled with rock music and my voice (which im not bragging about)!

Okay, so as most of you know, i haven't been singing. but sometimes, i accedentally start, and then i remember i'm average, and stop. but i really miss singing. like the other day at rehersal, the music director told us to sing loud, and normally when i did sing, she never told us that. it's just, between what my mom said, and the lead's a-fucking-mazing voice, i don't want to try and end up embarassing myself. and, i haven't listened to music since then, and i really miss it! but whenever i do, i want to sing. espsecaily when MCR comes on the radio. SO, i need to regain my confidance, cuz theres no way that i'll be able to start a band with my guitar skills.

Average. that one word means a whole lot. a couple nights ago, i was talking to my mom about talents and starting a band. and this is what she said: "...But you can't make it with an average voice. You know, unless you auto-tune or something..." and i swear to God (which i never do unless im fucking positive), i almost cried right there. Almost. for one thing, she actually thinks i would ever auto tune! the nerve of that woman! and, for my entire life since i started singing, she had said that i was great at it, that it was a God-given talent of mine. and that night, she just called it average. i never bragged about my voice. i always listened to other people's opinions, because i felt that's what really mattered. but to me, hers mattered the most. i'm labeled as 'The Bad Child' and so i wanted to impress her somehow, and by starting a band that will hopefully save your life, i thought that would. BUT, that probably won't happen anymore because i now have an average voice.

Write the first thing that comes to mind.

01 Hello: Evanescence
02 Love: Plain White T's
03 Cow: Genetically Enhanced Meat
04 Peace: Hippies
05 Sky: Sky Island
06 Mr. Big: Sonic X
07 Horror: Movie

Answer with only one word.

01 You are a: girl
02 You drink: cappacinos
03 Your first kiss: bad
04 Where are you: America
05 You like: explosions
06 Hate is: stupid
07 Love is: complicated
08 You dream of: stuff
09 You can’t spell: ???
10 Your favourite colour is: blue

Answer either yes or no. No “maybes” allowed.

01 You like a boy/girl: Yes.
02 You would kiss someone for $10: No
03 You’re addicted to facebook: no
04 You’re addicted to blogs: no
05 Pink looks nice on guys: Yes
06 You can’t keep a secret: no
07 Do you have any siblings: yes
08 You know what an asterisk is: no
09 You dye your hair: no

Write the first thing each colour makes you think of.

01 Red: blood
02 Green: cows
03 Teal: seals
04 Maroon: 5
05 Silver: Hedgehog

I just got my first guitar and my first lessons. My teacher is very shy and doesn't talk much. Kinda ironic since he's a guitar instructer. the place where I went was completly messy, and unorganized, and i liked it that way. It drove my mom insane though. My teacher, Tom, said i did really well, but i think he's just saying that. the first thought i had when he saw me was, "Ah, you thought i was white." and "Aha, i'm black, betchya didn't see that comin!" but anyway, the guitar is hard, but easier than the keyboard. i named my guitar Toxixc Sound. my mom said that's more of a band name, but, Toxic Sound just seems to fit him. and by him, i mean my guitar. i know it's weird that i gave my guitar a gender, but i don't care. but looking through the chords and music, it all seems really hard, and i keep thinking, "what the hell did i get myself into?" but, me being me, i know i'll make it work.

BEFORE YOU READ, I APOLOGIZE IF I OFFEND ANYONE.

hello again. last night while looking at guitars, my mom, i felt, insulted my dream of becoming a rockstar. i wanted a Flame Teal Luna Andromeda guitar that was $269. she was beautiful. on the fret board, the markers were different phases of the moon. so i showed my mom and our budget was $100 or less. she said if i was good, (i havent started the lessons yet) she woud get me her. so i agreed. then we started looking at amps, and they were really expensive. so she asked why i didn't start out with a regular guitar, (by that, i think she ment acustic). and she started getting mad at me. She called my dream a 'dream', which is exactly what it is, but, she said it in a way that she made it seem like she doesn't believe that i can make it a reality. and ever since i told her that i don't want to be a writer (i'm really good at writing, and she thought that was more 'practical'), she's been talking to me about alternative jobs, and trying to change my mind.

It's 12:02 am, and i'm bored, so im going to post another blog. i have a list of stuff i have to acomplish before i die, or get too old to acomplish them. so, i decided to share it with you. But i'm warning you now, some of the stuff is pretty stupid, so don't hate.
[ ] learn to draw manga/anime (is there a differeance?)
[ ] finish writng a book
[ ] get a lead role in a school play
[x] get a top comment on youtube
[ ] see My Chemical Romance live
[ ] go to a concert
[ ] (we're getting a little girly here) get a boyfriend
[ ] write more then 2 1/4 of songs that don't suck
[ ] go to London, England
[ ] go to Tokoyo, Japan
[ ] finish reading the 39 clues
[ ] get a cell phone
[ ] meet Sick Puppies
[ ] learn to skate board
[ ] don't lose this list until it's finished
[ ] break some bad habbits
[ ] do good in school
[x] eat melon bread (it's Japanese :3)
[ ] learn some Japanese
[ ] START A BAND AND BECOME A ROCKSTAR
[ ] never EVER wear contacts EVER
[ ] don't get fat

So, a while ago, I had tried out for the school play, 'Alice'. i really wanted Alice, or any lead, and this year, i had finally gotten over my fear of singing in public. So i sang my fucking heart out at the try outs, and got a call back. i acted and sang the best i could, but then i saw someone that crushed my hopes. i'm not saying names, but she sings like a goddess. Compared to her, i sing like a frog. so i wasn't suprised when she got Alice and i got Griffin. But at rehersal today, when i heard her sing, i was so disapointed and jealous, that i had to leave the room to keep from crying. and i hate crying. The girl who got Alice is really popular, has the best cloths, perfect skin and prettiest hair. She's supper smart and good at everything, while i have short, crappy hair, acne, AIS classes, invusble to most, (i'm not ugly, but she's gorgeous compared to me) and i suck at most things.

*Sigh* Sometimes, i think my friend doesn't like me anymore. we've been close friends since fourth grade, but recently, i've noticed that she's been kinda not acting the same. it's a really stupid thing to go off of, but, for example: one day when i needed a seat on the bus, she told me that someone else (i'm not saying names) is going to sit with her, and they only talk on the bus. i know it's okay for her to have other friends, but sometimes, when i look at her, i feel like she has more fun with other people than me. Also, she tells our other friends her problems, but not me, the one who's known her since elmentary school. i get that our other friend's known her longer, but i feel like she doesn't trust me. and whenever we're quiet, it's always awkward, unlike with my other friend. i know it's pretty dumb, since we've been friends forever, and i try not to think about it, but it keeps nawing at me.