So he texted me today..shouldve seen it coming. He said we needed to talk about "us". Unfortunately I dont see an "us". I tried so hard to find a spark between us...hes so good to me...too good to me. When we hungout it was nice but there was something missing. He really likes me. I dont want to break his heart but I know that when I tell him, hes going to hate me. I care to much about his feelings. I dont know what to do...I need to tell him sooner or later. Its not fair to not tell him. What do I say though? I cant find the words.
So not shortly after sending my previous blog, my roommate returned from her busy day out. We got to talking about some things that were on our minds. Guess we are more alike then I thought. We both expressed our concerns about feeling "empty" and shared some stories about heartbreak and about our passions for our major and hobbies. It was great to connect with someone. The coolest part is that most of our experiences are the same! And to top it off we have the same birthday! Cool right? I feel so much better than before. I am not alone....sometimes its nice to be reminded of that. =)
Well the big move in day was Tuesday with classes that started the next day. Yeah it was great to see everyone...especially my fantastic group but somehow theres something missing. Is there something wrong with me? I feel so quiet...the only things I feel like I can really talk about are dumb stories from the summer or stupid things I do. I missed my friends a lot and they missed me but somehow I feel like I am just a go to girl when theres no one else...except they don't even realize it. Maybe I am over thinking it as always but I feel like theres something or someone missing.
Well, tomorrow is the big day!! Move in day =)
Off to start my sophomore year in college. . . . before this weekend I was so excited. When I started packing I realized how much I am going to miss being home! It feels as though I JUST got home for summer break and I was UNPACKING...and now I am packing all over again.
Besides that, I am excited to see all of my close friends...I can't believe its my second year! Got a busy year ahead with all of my classes! I have 11 classes! Isnt that crazy??
WISH ME LUCK
peace and love,
So... its been a tough year between starting college, making new friends, juggling work, being backstabbed by ex-bestfriends, and getting over a past lover?.....I regret not coming on here as much as I used to. This was supposed to be the place where I could release all my emotions and be kind of like my online diary. So....why did I stop? Well doesn't matter anymore because now Im here to stay.
So heres my update....I am now 19 years old as of July 30th. I am a very happy and proud Music Education major at Adelphi University in Long Island New York.
So first of all...i live in New Jersey and the weather right now is CRAZY!! Theres so much snow over here so i uploaded a Pic of my House =) good thing theres no school this week so i dont have to travel through all the snow and slush.
Second of all im super excited because i got a callback from The Juilliard School of Music for a live audition. =) Although very nervous, im so excited..who knows? This school could be the school i go to for college. =)
Scared...NERVOUS!! I go to a performing arts high school and im a senior now and i applied to 5 music conservatories including Manhattan School of Music, Juilliard, Ny fim academy, Mannes, and Eastman. I REALLY HOPE I GET IN!!!!! wish me luck fellow killjoys!!!
Thought i would upload only a few of my photos from the MCR concert this past friday at Roseland Ballroom Ny, New York. Best Concert Evr!!!
So today i waited 3 hours out in the freezing cold weather outisde in new york for my fav band evr OFCOURSE MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE!! First of all Ray waved at me specifically when i went to the back of the stage as well as Gerard...yay!!! it really upset me though that they didnt really appreciate the fact that a bunch of fans waited long hours in the cold just to c them. It wasnt the best..trust me. Anywayzzz im super grateful that not only did i get to c them but i also had gone to the concert friday dec 3rd which was awesome!!! Im excited til they get back to NY in April!! <3
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!
AS a present....i got an all day pass to clean the house for my dads surprise bday tomorrow. Messed up rite? On top of that...no presents bc my mom said she spent so much money between my bros wedding last Saturday and my dads bday party tomorrow. Whats wrong is that my dads actual bday is August 11. smh smh