shar-deenie's blog

i just wanted to say a big thank you to my beautiful saviors reading your comments and messages really made a diffrence. i was going through a really bad patch and i couldent hold it in anymore, a few bad things happened to me and it mad me sick to my stomach. i havent spoken about it until now and i cant bear to write it down, but you guys im okay now and im sorry for scaring you all like that. im okay i promise and im safe.
back at school!!!! woopwoop!
im writing my own frerard fanfic and im geting into it, im also writing fresh new lyrics. so if you guys wanna hear...
my fanfic is actually getting pretty long and there is a lot of umm *sex* cough! cough!

this isnt a selfharm post, but im not sure what to do. im not okay im really not. im starting to believe theres only one way out. i just wrote this poem please dont judge me

inside im crying
inside im dying
cold, broken, stopped
silently im weeping
im soon to be SLEEPING
this is what you're doing to me
its killing
its breaking
y'all think that im faking
but seriously
im really
not
im dead
now

sorry xx
no matter what happens to me, you guys stay safe please xxxxx

everyone on this site, i love ou and im not pissed with you and its not aimed at you, im just a bit emotional at the moment. its fine i'll get over it, i just have issues.
and ALSO... some stuuupid person made a video, about how much they hate gerard and put it on youtube!!!!!! iis DISCUSTING!!!!! I THREW A PLLOW AT THE LAPTOP AND SCREAMED "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU ASSHOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEE! WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?" stupid people what the fuck?
remember, not aimed at you guys, i love you all. stay strong xxxxxx

i dont knw what this is, im dying on the inside. im DYING! i cant do this anymore. CANT. DO. THIS. WHY IS IT SO HARD?I CANT PRETEND ANYMORE!!!!???? i need to talk to someone anyone! please.

i totaly nearly broke my foot doing the 'rusputine dance' SHIT what a i doing with myself?

i hope you all have a good dooms day!!! its gonna be great! i woke up this morning and i was like "oh, im still alive... YES that means i can listen to three cheers for sweet revenge wooooo!" i listen to it every morning and im like "IM NOT OKAAAAAYYYYY YOU WEAR ME OUT!!!!!!" at 5:30 in the morning. my moms like "SHUT YOUR FACE! IM TRYING TO FUCKING SLEEP BITCH!" so i crank it up and sing more!!!! XD XD XD XD XD
if we dont die today, guys have a very merry christmas!!!!

this morning i looked in my mirror. my hair was frizzy, eyeliner and mascara all over my face, i had a spot on my chin and i looked a mess. a month ago i would have cringed and cryed and moaned. but today i really looked and i saw what i saw. me. actually me. i looked sleepy, and i had just gotten up. my eyes were shining in the lamplight and i breathed in. one word escaped my lips. "beautiful". im starting to realize that im happy with being unperfect. thats who i am, and thats how i'l stay. :D
keep strong killjoys xx

nobody owns MCR do they? we wish we did, but we don't :( i know I do! but fanfiction is brilliant because we can pretend things happen that we wish and it all of a sudden becomes real to you! and its great. not sure if thats just me or what but im wrighting a frerard and im loving how its like my imagination... RUNS WILD!!!!!!

guess what????!?!?!?!?!?! im out of hospital!!!!!!!! YEAH! FUCK YEAH!!!! im not compleatly better but im getting there!!!!!!!!!! happy dance, HAPPYDANCE!!!!!!!!

oh. im. laughing out loud, out load ,out loud. its time for all to say... the uni-horn, oh the uni-horn has come outside to plaaaayyyyy!!!
i saw him once, i saw him twice, upon rainbows he did fly. when the rain had stopped, and the sun went in he flew back into the sky!
BUT. forsooth! a man named mikey did see. the uni-horn, the uni-horn, and so they went and had tea!!!
"stay a while, oh stay a while" young mikey sure did plea
"i can't my friend, i can't my friend, i simply have to flee! for the poneys, oh the poneys, will surely be after meeee!" the uni-horn replyed
the uni-horn licked mikeys hand and into the sky he flllyyyyeeddddd!!!!!

"hey gerard!?"
"yeah mikey?"
"i just got licked by a uni-horn!!!!!!! *hysterical laugh*"
"um mikey?"
"yeah?"
"goodmorning"
"aw SHOOT!"

XD