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agoraphobia

so i met with my new psychiatrist and it went awful, i typically made a fool of myself and dread going back on monday. He diagnosed me with agoraphobia, no surprise there. I really don't wanna be this way.

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uhh

I have my first meeting with my new psychiatrist tomorrow, level 3 whatever that means, wish me luck ;')

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oh golly gosh

Me and my nephew had the Kerrang! channel on today and omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg omg during the commercials May Death Never Stop You was advertised, i was upstairs and i ran down the minute i heard teenagers playing and OMG i'm so excited! Even my dad looked happy haha :D
Sorry, i got excited (。●́‿●̀。)
xo

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Hopes up high...

My Dad says that in 2 years MCR will be back together, i really hope he's psychic.

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Nosey

It's been 4 years but i'm finally taking my nose piercing out. We've had a good run, lots of bloody noses after being punched and getting it caught on jumpers and stuff but it's time to go. Now to get a lot more ear piercings :D

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Happy Birthday Jensen! <3

Happy birthday to this awesome talented guy, Mr Jensen Ackles! Love him haha <3<3<3 ヾ(*д*)ノ゛

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what do i look like to you?

Being the awesome sister that i am, sometimes, i never hesitate to allow my sister to borrow my black skinny jeans or leather jacket (despite her stretching the jeans :/ ) cause she does have her sisterly moments-ish. Yesterday i asked her could i borrow her hipster glasses, not to go out anywhere in them but just to wear, and she literally snatched them of my face which is unfair considering she's always using my things like the clothes or bracelets and rings. She isn't like me in any way believe me, she's a tomboy in every sense of the word but still i lend or give them to her. Today she phoned and asked could she use my jeans to, wait for it....go to a rock club. She hates rock music. Her girlfriend does though which is why i suggested we all go to one sometime. Anyway, she said she wanted them to wear to this club and as if she realized what she said she asked me really quickly if i wanted to go in which i told her to fuck off and go buy her own jeans.

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Good to be back

It's been months since i've been on here, bad, i know, but i'm back YAY! I contemplated coming back on for days but at least i'm here now. I know i was messaging people before, and i hope you're all doing well! It was really nice as i was logging in that it remembered my user name (obviously, i know) but still... i'm emotional here haha. Gonna try and at least blog once a week but knowing how much i love this place i'll do it more and everyone will hate me sooner or later ;) My sisters wedding in 6 months and i refused to be a bridesmaid (point to me) and my nephew is going as a super steampunk dude, goggles and everything, i may have played a part in that. I intended to go as a super goth chick and ruin all her bridal photos but since she picked terrible bridesmaid dresses i'm just gonna try and look nice and piss my sister off that way.

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Day from hell.

This is the story of how i was chased out of CAMHS. One of the worst days ever... so far.

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Held up so high on such a breakable thread.

My anxiety has gotten so bad it's making my depression worse too. And i'm sorry to you guys who read this crap but this is the only place i feel i can vent. I've been having even worse panic attacks than ever and it's not just every once in a while now, it's every night. Last week in my driving lesson i nearly hit a rail cause i started getting anxious. My driving instructor used to be a psychiatrist so she understands and helps me which is cool of her.