MyApocalyptic's blog

50 LITTLE SECRETS
Be honest no matter what.

[ONE] Who was your last text from?
I have no idea. My texts are out. I bet it was Ali. or Dima.

[TWO] Where was your profile pic taken?
Mum's car.

[THREE] Your relationship status?
Single and sad cos it's almost St.Val's day and i used to be happy about that. :C

[FOUR] Have you ever lost a close friend?
as in dead? no. as in yeah? yeah.

[FIVE] What is your current mood?
i don't know. i really dont. but it's ok, whatever it is :p

[SIX] Whats your brother(s)/sister(s) names?
Lana Tiffany Blake

[SEVEN] Do you have a job?
i DID >:C they laid me off. going back this summer :p when they WANT me >:C

[EIGHT]Where do you wish you were right now?
Right right now? Uhhhh. The ballroom at Aleyeska Hotel chilling with that FRENCH BOY.
God, him and his sexy eyebrows.

[NINE] Have a crazy side?
baby i AM a crazy side.

[TEN] Ever had a near death experience?
Not that I know of?

[ELEVEN] Something you do a lot?

I know a man who loves jazz and girls
He wants the life,
Like he wants the world, and
I know a man who when he stands he moves
When he moves he walks
And when he walks he’s dancing

Sometimes he rock
Sometimes he roll
Sometimes he fall
Sometimes he get back up
And then he rock
And then he roll
He never stop
Until he get back home

I know a man who lives in fancy house
Just up the street,
He play his music loud and
I know a man who wears shiny shoes
He reads the bard
While he drinks the booze

Sometimes he rock
Sometimes he roll
Sometimes he learn
Sometimes he learn to cry
And then he rock
And then he roll
Sometimes we born
Sometimes we got to die

Lately he been on his own
His curtains drawn
Like he’s all alone, but
I know a man who knows he’s better than that
He’ll pick him up
And pack his bags

When you got nobody you still got yourself
To sing you songs
To keep a story to tell
And I know a man who sing them night and day

Let's be shallow for a minute.
That's not his name, fyi.
He just looks like someone named Craig. Not someone that would be named Craig, someone already named Craig. Anyway.
He's very cute. In my point of view. Deep set eyes. Smallish mouth. Thin. Knows his memes AND his philosophy. Likes music. Yes, indeed. Can hold a perfectly random conversation. Likes Asian food.
Yes, this Craig-boy is growing on me.
He's dating right now.
I want him to be my valentine. That I do.
I want him very badly.
We shall be the best of friends.
Anyway.
TODAY IS MY SISTER'S BIRTHDAY, let's all wish her a lovely year.
She puts up with so much <3
xmorgan

you’re making this a
hard time
intruding on my
new life
breaking hearts and
calculators
chewing like an
alligator
deep into my
second thoughts
begging for the
heat to stop
a mission that’s still
incomplete
your mem’ry rendered
obsolete
my summer in the
melting slow
too late for a
midnight show
words like spilled wine
overflowing
living with the
never knowing
the only one left still
to blame
is she who swore she’d have
no shame
when summer came and made
leaves fall
she’d got some in her
after all
and drunken burning
in the night
she leaves the city
to the light
crashing tumbling
all about
her mind a mess her
heart without
the courage left to
be the one
to forget first and,
finally done,
live long and win at
every game
and every lion’s
brave heart tame
a promise kept, an
end complete
still on the hill
stand empty seats
to linger, rot, and
then return
to blackened soil
cities burned
a throne, a kingdom
late and loud

Time I talk?
I think so.

God, I feel like such a loner here now. Ironic! Please don't tell me I'm not, you have no idea.
Stop being a downer, Morgan, jesus, I'm just here to talk.
ANYWAY.
This is the first time I've been here in FOREVER. There's ghosts here. Ghosts I don't wanna talk to. So go away!
I know that was harsh but go away! I'm done! I'm finished! Finally. Is this how you're going to make it, year after year?
Go be yourself. You don't need me. You don't need me to say that I care in any way.
You don't need me to lie.
I'm sorry you're fucked up. I'm sorry you fucked me up. That's all I can say.

I don't have any songs today. I do, but not any I wanna post.
Not yet.

I'm going to Austria next year, is my big news.
As a foreign exchange student.
Yeah, my grades haven't been bad lately... amazing.

the pain is gone
I could feel the hazy hungry hands reaching
pulling it slowly like a rope
out of me
it's a funny feeling, and
I know I'm not wrong, look I see
everything
I never knew the Christmas lights were faeries
I never knew the taste of cranberries
tasted like you
everything is o thick and warm
even snow feels like delicious wet July
even ice would melt on my tongue
I'm not even moving but watch me watch me dance
watche me watch me touch these colours
how could it be so cloudy
but so vivid
but so real
oh never leave me
oh you are delicious
oh I'll never hurt again
the only thing that hurts
is wanting
more

xoapo

Aaaahhh I shouldn't even talk about this.

But for the record, public apologies to everybody.

Everyone I know anyway.

Almost everybody.

But especially...yeah.

I've been a biiitch.

Anyway.

I got the equivalent of stood up at the dance. Sort of. Is it stood up if they say they'll go with you and then go out of their way to avoid you the entire time? Euuuh.

It's the lipstick.
My lipstick must be cursed.
*blames inanimate objects for relationship problems*

xoapo

My beautiful year is up.
Don't say it-- don't say there are two more months to go.
My book began in October, Chapter One:
Chapter Two:
And so forth.
Some were longer than others,
but all were sweet, and beautiful, some hot and powerful and driving, some soft and so wonderful you don't want to leave.
It is as sure that this year I learned to love as it was last that I learned to burn.
So let's have a little look back (I'm alone in this- you don't have to read. I'm a selfish blogger.)
We'll begin on October 15th. It's a little after that but that's when I went to Oklahoma.
That's when it began.
That's when I met Sam Un.
That's not of course, his real name, I knew him by the name "Sami" then but no longer refer to him as such, we'll see why later.
This Sami, he baffled me. He was so hotheaded yet seemed to care for me quite a bit. I fell for him, I'll admit it.
On November first we had a fight and that's where my

I'll watch you as you
let down your load
heavy shoulders sighing
I'll watch you as you
let down the light
and move your feet through warm
through dark
through warm
-and you began to dance
I watched you as you carefully
half-stepped your way through murky days
the murky dark
your murky heart
and I'll watch you as you

fall

xoapo

If I decided to stop keeping secrets for you.
I make a dangerous enemy, boy
xoapo