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My first kiss... my first love

Today is the 1 year anniversary of my first kiss. I know you are probably thinking how this girl is crazy if she remembers the day of her first kiss. and I'm gonna tell you i'm not one of those sentimental girls who remembers stuff like this; normally i would forget the date, but its kind of hard too when you have a party every single year the day you got your first kiss. this party is kind of my reminder of it. there are good memories and bad ones connected to this day. I mean good memory is I got my fucking first kiss and it was a magical moment. bad memory is that it was with my first love and my now ex boyfriend.It really was a magical moment, it was the kind of kiss that people wish they could be kissed like. and i'm not saying that because i'm totally bias on this. it really was like that.'s picture


1) Height? 5'1
2) Virgin? Yes
3) Shoe size? 4 1/2
4) Sexual orientation? Straight
5) Do you smoke? Nope
6) Do you drink? Nope
7) Do you take drugs? no
8) Age you get mistaken for? 19, im 16
9) Have tattoos? No
10) Want tattoos? yes
11) Have piercings? yes 3 ears and belly button
12) Want piercings? maybe
13) Best friend? leah, patrick, meredith
14) Biggest turn ons? good sense of humor, doesnt take themselves to seriously
16) Biggest turn offs? being to cocky
17) Favorite movie? Cinderella man
18) I will love you if... you dont judge me, just treat me like a normal person. except me for who I am
19) Someone you miss? Liam's picture

The Girl

There's a girl in the mirror.
I wonder who she is.
Sometimes I think I know her.
Sometimes I really wish I did.
There's a story in her eyes, of lullabies and goodbyes.
When she's looking back at me, I can tell she's hurting inside

Sometimes you gotta smile and walk away.
Hold in your tears and pretend you are okay.

so often I look in the mirror
trying to find something beautiful
but all I see is me...

She strikes a pose but dies inside
nobody knows she is a beautiful suicide

you never Guess a girl so happy on the outside
is breaking down on the inside

a girl who laughs her head off everyday in school
you'd never guess the million tears behind her smile

she wants you to tell her things will be okay,
but she hates being lied too

she puts on a smile to hide the lies,
and walks a world where she slowly dies's picture

The man in the mirror

Who is this man staring back at me?
is he a part of my past? or who I'm destined to be?

And this wretched soul who stands before my eyes..
when I am hurt deeply is it him or me who cries?

Do we share each other's thoughts? are we one and the same?
and when I harm others, which one of us is to blame?

Does he see me as well? Does he see my soul?
does he cry when he sees its nothing more than a black hole?

reflection against reflection, like a brother against brother
which one is me? which one is the other?'s picture

Best Friends no more

best friends?!?! thats what we call this? all that means is that im there for you whenever you need me. but the one time that i struggle and am crying out for help. are you there? no you ignore my calls, my texts, my facebook messages. i just needed someone to tell me that its gonna be okay. that im gonna survive this. but no one is there. why cant anyone be there? why cant you just be there?