mcsquizzymcr's blog

Gerard Way. Not to plagiarize Sweeney Todd, but the man is a paragon of integrity... and he's super fucking hot. Whoa! Didn't see that coming did you? Well I have bisexual tendencies and I happen to find Gerard Way, and Johnny Depp for that matter, to be extremely attractive. Anyway, the man is nothing short of incredible. We all know his story, a humble artist who is fed up with not making a difference in the world rises to power and accomplishes his mission. We wouldn't be on this site if he hadn't. Gerard is so inspirational to me and he is everything I hope to be some day. One of my fantasies is to actually perform live with him when I become a famous musician. Its going to happen people I have faith. To get to the nuts and bolts of this blog, I just want to thank him on behalf of everyone he's inspired and to tell him that I love him. I wouldn't be who I am today without his influence. Have a nice day everyone.

Everyone has their own vices, some worst than others. My vices include cigarettes, narcotics, and drugs, but I'm aware that I'm not a bad person, I just have things about myself that need improvement. We shouldn't judge people just because they have less than favorable habits and we should never hate someone just because of a disagreement in philosophies or because they do something that disgusts you in some form or another. The only thing that we should dislike about a person is if they are full of hatred and evil. That's right, malice is the ultimate vice. I feel that people who expunge all of their energy through hatred and pain are wasting the precious gift of life that their parents blessed them with. So, the next time you say you hate someone, think twice about what you're saying because the only thing that is truly deserving of your hatred is evil....

Okay, the title of this blog does not imply what most are thinking, so let me explain what I mean. I, for the record, am not a hermaphrodite, but I use the word androgynous because I do see a lot of feminine characteristics in my personality. Like a female, I am sensitive, loving, and have a very nurturing personality. I like that. Not only do characteristics like that tend to make my relationships better, but also provide a sense of comfort for the significant other. Like when someone says they're ugly. Let me tell you what ugly is ladies and gentleman. Ugly is being cruel, remorseless, selfish, arrogant, ignorant, pretentious, or any other negative quality that you can attribute to a human being. If you are a good person and warm at heart, it doesn't matter what you look like. People shouldn't focus on looks to decide who they want to be with, it should be personality and if the person your with actually makes you feel good about yourself.

At this point in my life, I feel that I have experienced enough pain for a single person's entire lifespan, so now I put all my energy into positive thinking and motivational support. Among my group of friends, everyone comes to me when they have a problem and they've done that since they've known me, even when I myself was emotionally incapable of handling my own shit list. I do this because I love my friends and I would do anything to help them succeed in life. I believe that in order to achieve self-appreciation you must be appreciated. Luckily for me, I've succeeded in half of that category so I enjoy helping others. In reality, I hate myself and always have, I find nothing good about me so I tend to be humble about most things and I don't want my friends to know this because if they did they wouldn't let me help them anymore, and that's just not acceptable. So my question is is this normal?

So last week, I stayed awake from 10 AM Monday morning to 2 AM Friday.... don't ask me why. During all those sleepless hours, I realized that I have an overwhelming anxiety problem which I could have eradicated while I was in the hospital so many months ago. Well, Thursday during my math class I was looking at this girl that had been staring at me since the beginning of class. Usually when a woman looks at me, I timidly look away because I fear any possible negative outcome that could happen simply by looking at this gorgeous young lady, but on that day I was fed up with it and I was going insane from the lack of sleep so I said fuck it and talked to her after class. We laughed and had a glorious time and then I ended the conversation stating that I would talk to her in the future and I watched her walk away, totally blown away by her in every way that comes to my mind. Well today I managed to completely hide myself from her.

Considering I have a two hour break in between my classes, I'm just going to continuously blog about trivial topics. Heart break. Some of us have been there and some of us haven't. Kudos to those who haven't. It fucking sucks, especially when your ex hooks up with your best friend after they had previously stated that nothing would ever happen between them. No matter what side of the fence you're on, it has an affect on both parties so its always hard for someone. How to get over it is such a frequently asked question so I'm going to answer it in the way that I got over my tragedy. Music. Its the only cure. Its been around for, let's see, forever and has impacted every culture in a significant way or another. This is why I inquire, "why can't we use it as medicine?" Well we can and I'm living proof. I tortured my body with razors and drugs after the breakup, but what was always there for me afterwards, after all the smoke had cleared, was music.

So my second blog exposed the inner darkness I have inside me. Contrary to the ideas about my personality that one may have picked up from my last blog, I'm actually a very happy person. I went to a mental hospital last year for major depression issues and psychosis, which is when an individual hears or sees things that don't actually exist. After my release, life has been relatively swell. Then I joined this website and I really enjoy reading the fellow community member's posts. You all have something interesting and thought-provoking to say and its so nice other than reading the same type of status updates on Facebook. Just another mainstream invention that just doesn't seem to stop annoying me. Anyway, I really didn't have a point for this blog, I just felt like saying hi to everyone. Hi!!!!!!!

Everyday I wake up and go on the internet and look up what's going on in the world. I feel its necessary for people to know what's going on in society today so that they can shove it to all the ignorant and fucking mainstream people. When I tap into the news its usually the same old shit, something creative and brilliant dies and something from the newest rap artist or someone who has no talent and no artistic ambition is praised for the same 3 chords we've been hearing since 1960. I feel that the world of music is being crippled by itself, by all the producers and just the plain fact that if you're a musician you have the potential to make millions of dollars. Essentially, this is why I love My Chemical Romance, and many other bands in the world of rock, and other related genres of music, because they put their heart and soul into their music.

This is my first post on the website. I write and composed music that is influenced by bands like My Chemical Romance, Slipknot, Billy Talent, and Thirty Seconds to Mars.I'm an avid fan of MCR and have been inspired by Gerard Way in many facets of my life. So if I sound cool friend me or do whatever