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MCRbeatupemomusic's blog

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So... I got something to say.

How am I going to do this? I want to tell a girl that I love her... like a lot. I tried today but she was like "Wha? I'm confused." And I was like of course, because nothing can work that easily -_-
So... I'm confused... Since 4th grade I've been wanting to tell her how I feel... But everytime I'm around her my knees turn to jelly and my head starts rolling. And I'm so deep in the friendzone with her that if I showed up at her house with flowers and chocolates, she'd say "Awwww... What a nice friend"
I wish I was more mean so I wouldn't be friendzoned. -_- Damn my goodness.

Only about 3 more months... And then she's gone.

I'm happy for her... Goveners School, good job, your talented. I've known this for 4 years... But she's going to leave... me... her friends. I'm not going to lie... Depression's on the horizon. Is it bad that I secretly hate myself for still having feelings for her? She left me alone on 2-15-11. I hate that day. I hate the day before. I hate my sorry excuse of a life compared to what it was. And it seems she just taunts me with conversations about us.... Things like, "Too Early" and "Maybe Later". I wish it was later. I wish she could stay. I wish I wasn't a terrible boyfriend.

Well... You said "Awkward"!

I think I've probably crossed the line about ehhh.... 10 times in the last three days... But when life gives you lemons... eat them! XDDDDD But really.... this is also kind of like a blog to ask you guys to if I'm a dumbass. I need to stop dreaming.... But what I've been doing is kissing this girl on the cheek everyday at the weirdest moments.

Stolen... XP

1. Height: Uhhhhhh.... About 5'5

2. Virgin? YES.

3. Shoe size: 10

4. Sexual Orientation: Straight...

5. Do you smoke? NEVER EVER.

6. Do you drink? NOPE! :)

7. Do you take drugs? HELL NO.

8. Age you get mistaken for: 14 or 15

9. Tattoos? Nahhhhh.... Not yet!

10. Piercings? Nope!

11. Best friend? Kali Fillhart

12. Relationship status: Friend Zone

13. Favorite movies: Saving Private Ryan and any fantasy movie. XD

14. Someone you miss: Nobody... I look to the future and try to keep a straight path...

15. Most traumatic experience: Being broken up with the day after Valentines Day with a girl

XD XD XD XD Best night Ever!

Chilling with her... Awesome... I may not be her boyfriend... but someday.... XD So we spun around in my yard with a couple other friends and played manhunt. When are turn to count was up we just sat there and talked about our feelings... Then I said it... I asked her out... annnnnnnnnnd she just smiled and changed the subject.

And if your heart stops beating....

So. This is about how suckish the FriendZone is. It's like the mafia, you'll never get out. So, I'm in the FriendZone with a girl at my school, the nicest and sweetest girl I've ever met. She lets people joke with her. So I don't get slapped as much.

I think I'm the biggest dumbass in the friggen world...

So this chick I know, she's a MCR fan. She's really freaking cool and stuff, but I'm at like FRIEND ZONE LEVEL: BROTHER. So, she comes in with an MCR shirt on today. I look down at my pathetic Soccer Jersey and sigh. But a couple days ago this kid was staring at her chest and we all pointed it out. He was so embarassed I felt bad for him... But this MCR shirt was from the Honda Civic tour, right? So it had the guys and the red X's over them with the word exterminate.

Cage the Elephant! To me their like fucking think-medicine!!!!

Cage the Elephant. They have some upbeat songs... but they always make me think about the dark message. Like the song "Right Before My Eyes" It make's me think about how little you can trust people... and "Always Something" Makes me think about how unloyal and devious humans are, how they hurt you and how people always get revenge.

I feel like curling up in a ball... and just wait for the world to blow up...

I feel like shit today... One of my coolest friends left for missuori on saturday... Breaking my best friends heart as he left... I wanted to say something nice to her but she decided to skip school today... I keep being asked by my friends if I'll ask her out making my now ex girlfriend upset, so I've promptly denied them. Not because I don't like her, but because it's so WRONG. In every sense of the word. That would be like Gerard dieing and then Frank try to get her! (I know he's married.

I do beleive the truth should be spoken...

I broke up with her... It shouldn't bother me that now she's so happy-go-lucky (because I brought up the stuff about her depression) right? And I think I'm done with women for a minute. Why? Because, A couple days ago I asked a girl out right there on the spot. No idea why. No idea what possessed me to ask her like that, but I did have an idea that it was probably that dumbest shit I've done in a while. So for a little bit, it's hopefully going to be ME not US. I want to go help murder that new dog down the road that keeps me awake when I'm trying to sleep.