Ida_t's blog

Do you ever feel like you just want to shut down your brain and stop thinking on the millions things you're thinking on?
I often feel that way when I can't fall asleep in the evening... (I'm not trying to sleep now)
and now I'm just thinking on a lot of different things, school (should be studying), my economy (pretty broke at the moment) and then all of the relations I have to different people, it's hard =/
and then yesterday I manage to confuse myself.... to explain the story, I have depression, and I used to cut myself but stopped a year ago, but still feel like I want to when I'm really sad and depressed. So yesterday I was on my way home from my cousin (my best friend) and I wasn't really happy, but nothing near really depressed, just kind of somewhere in between, and I just felt the urge to cut myself =/ and it made me confused cause like I said, I only felt it before when I was really depressed =/

Just watching simpson together with my cousin ;P
haven't done much today...
but I realized I'm spending to much time on the internet, today I've spent more than six hours infront of my computer xD
should really get a life ;P but I like to talk to people on msn and facebook and reading blogs and stuff ;P it's better than studying xD
and then I'm pretty broke, so I can't afford doing anything anyway =/
so, thats my pretty lame friday ;P
take care everyone!
xo

Good morning evryone!
(cause where I am it's morning ;P)
I love that we now can send messages to eachother on the site xD
otherwise I don't like the new layout that much, it's okay but I think it's gotten a bit harder to get an overwiev of stuff, but I geuss I get used to it =)
met my psychologist this morning, and finally get the feeling that we're going somewhere =)
going to the library today to see if I can find any of the books I need for the next course in school, cause I really can't afford to buy them all =/ it sucks that books should be so expencive =(
no school today! yay!
meeting my cousin later =)
geuss thats all I have to write for now =)
Take care!
xo

ONE- Hi =)
TWO - Are you single? yes
THREE - Whats your favorite number? 3
FOUR - What color do you wear most? black
FIVE - Least favorite color? brownorange
SIX - Favorite candy? chocolate - in almost any form ;P
SEVEN - What do you smoke? a cigarett at aparty once in a while, but mostly nothing
EIGHT - Are you happy with your life right now? no.... haven't been for 3 years or more =/
NINE - Anyone ever said you resemble a celebrity? no
TEN - What is your favorite class in school? in highschool it was history or science, now I'm studying to become a nurse, so everything ;P
TWELVE - How do you make money? used to work in a "supermarket" but now I'm studying, so I don't.
THIRTEEN - Who is your best friend? my cousin, rose-marie
FOURTEEN - Where do you go to school? The red cross university college in stockholm
FIFTEEN - Are you outgoing? somewhere inbetween shy and outgoing
SIXTEEN - One word to describe you? negative (or realistic, depends on who says it ;P)
SEVENTEEN - Favorite pair of shoes? converse
EIGHTEEN - Do you own big sunglasses? No, I have glasses so I can't wear sunglasses anyway =/
NINETEEN - Where do you wish you were right now? somewhere else than here...
TWENTY - What should you be doing right now? studying physiology
TWENTY ONE - Do you have a crush on anyone right now? yes...

HONEST SECTION:
Honestly, what color is your underwear? black
Honestly, what's on your mind right now? everything and nothing, too much as always....
Honestly, what are you doing right now? listening to music, chatting on msn and doing this quiz
Honestly, have you done something bad today? hm, no, not really, made fun of the teacher during the lecture, but only my friend heard it anyway =/
Honestly, do you watch Disney channel? no
Honestly, who is the last person you talked to on the phone? my brother
Honestly, are you jealous of someone right now? yes

Just bored, and tired, but don't feel like going to bed, even if I maybe should =/
listening to fall out boy, and I think I start to like them more now, cause before I've just heard a few songs and thought they were good, but now I've got spotify so it so much easier to listen to different bands and stuff, so I listen to a bunch of their songs I've never heard before, and they're just really good =)
Just love spotify, and I managed to get it for free (in my country it usually costs to get it) ;P
hm, just write to have something to do, could read or something, but think I'm to tired, so I just play stupid facebook games instead ;)
If anyone out there have spotify, what do you think about it? Is it a good alternative to illegal downloading of music?
I've never downloaded that much anyway, so I just think it's great cause I can listen to whatever I want to ;P
this is the end of a boring blog ;P
take care!
xo

FAVORITE COLOR: black, or really dark purple

FAVORITE FOOD: chicken

FAVORITE SHOES: my converse

FAVORITE ITEM: my mp3 or my laptop

FAVORTE QUALITY ABOUT YOURSELF: no good at finding good things about myself, but geuss it would be my kindness then =)

FAVORITE PHYSICAL FEATURE ABOUT YOURSELF: my eyes

YOUR BF/GF MUST: be easy to talk to and be able to make me laugh

ONE WORD TO DESCRIBE YOURSELF: negative

YOUR FRIENDS ARE: fun and kind

FAVORITE WORD: don't know =/

FAVORITE ACTIVITY: listening to music while reading, or hanging out with my best friend

FAVORITE MCR BOY: frank or gerard =)

so, thats my answers ;P
xo

Just really tired today, didn't sleep that well, woke up like ten times or something =/
it's just really annoying =/
then I almost fell asleep in school today, it was intresting and all, but I was just so tired...
So now I decided not to go there to morrow (our lectures are optional, we just have to pass the test in the end of the course) cause if I don't get some more sleep I will just get really depressed =/
but then atleast I met my cousin today (she's like my best friend) and got to see her really cute baby rats (it was 16 of them) ;P
but for some reason I got pretty sad on the way home, but now I feel okay...
tace care everyone!
xo

Goodnight everybody!
Time to go to bed, wish I didn't have to go up so early tomorrow =/
but anyway, just hope that I might feel happy tomorrow aswell ;P
solong and goodnight! ;P
xo

Hi!
I'm just kind of suprised that I've been happy for almost two days ;P okay, I had a bit of a downer this morning, when I had to force myself out of bed, but then I met my friends in school and it all felt better =) so yeah, I've been happy since noon yesterday, and since I have a depression it's not that usual, so I really try to appreciate it as long as it lasts =)
really random thing to write, I know, but thought I should post something more positie when I'm for once feel pretty good =)
so, take care everyone!
xo

Today we got our two papers back that decides if we passed the course we finished last month, and I got a passing grade on both xD
So I'm really happy right now, cause I wont have to rewrite it or anything ;P and I was really nervous about that.
take care everyone!
xo