I Love MCR.'s blog

NO WAY IN HELL!!!! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MORE!

First on Friday i had my choir concert. Wich was fun cause after it i got to hug mike and hang with him. And we made plans to eat together for the last time before he graduates. I wanna bring him a rose for a thank you for being my best senior buddy ever and for dancing with me at festival. im going to miss him next year!!! and then yesterday was my brothers confirmation (Were lutheran (Christian)) and i spent that morning cleaning, getting ready and helping my mom. then wwe went to my church (wich is connected to the grade school) and we went to the school basement and set up all the food and stuff for the party. then my mother and i went to the church to set up all the cumunion stuff wich took like a 1/2 hour to do because we had to fill up all 80 of the little cups and put them into the two holder trays plus set up all the clothes and get the rest ready for common cup too wich always takes longer.

I am so tired of tryin to please everyone. I'm so freaking sick of having to be what everyone else wants me to be. I am so done trying. I am just sick of no one giving a damn what my opinion is! About my feelings and thoughts and who I am! I think there's like what one person here that I can be myself around and that's mike. And ou of state friends idk. I really don't. Maybe 2 or 3? I even feel like I I don't do this or I do that; that Keith is gonna get so freaking pissed lik he has. I'm so sick of nnot being myself because I I'm not how ppl want me then I'm no good. I'm jet so done trying. Sometimes I just wanna rip my hair out crawl in a corner and cut my skin off! Gir. I can't even be myself around my parents for shits sake! I am sooo done. I'm done not being cared about. I just am done.
So done with this shit,
Angela.

You wish the People you love most were with you right now. I feel like that right now. Bit it won't happen. I wish tho. Well tomorrow's another day of hell.
Xoxo
Angela

Here are pictures from my B day.

Today is a day to thank all mothers. Now killjoys I want all of you to wish your moms a happy mothers day. They deserve it. Even if you hate your mom you should at least still wish her a happy mOthers day for bringing you into this world. I hope all the killjoy mothers have a great mothers day. Stay beautiful and keep it ugly.
Xoxo,
Angela Rose

I feel like the world I once knew is crashing down around my in a firey explosion!!! Things have started to go downward for me:/ it sucks. So I need some advice. In the past I went to the guidance office at school and talked to a counselor who I trusted. It kinda helped but she didn't get my point. I really kinda wanna go to her tomorrow during study hall but I don't know if I should! What do you think?
Xoxo
Angela

Well evryone has left. Had a bad day at school, being bullied really sucks. then i come home and get yeled at by family. Next some jerk from school got my cell number and is harrassing me. My dad is in a bad mood, my mom is at work, and my brother is being a jerk like always. Keith decided to leave me and now im alone. I can't help but to cry. I guess I was always ment to be alone. I dont know what to do.
Save me from this darkness,
Angela.

I sure do know how to mess things up...... *shoots self* im stupid. i really am.

So Im at a confuzing time in life. Im stressed and confused and feeling kinda depressed. I dont know what to do with my life. First problem thats been keeping me up at night is the fact that the girl I always supported, loved, and was there for, my little sister (not by blood) never talks to me anymore, it tears me apart. Then another person who iv helped with all there problems suddenly is this girly girl liking all these boybands and singers i hate and being kinda mean and it hurts alot. Then theres the fact i can not stand going to school anymore. people constantly pick on me, call me names, hjate on me for no reason. Then the fact that N. ditched me because i had depression issues and just because of that she said it was "annoying" and left me. And now all of the sudden she is dressing like me, listening to my type of music wich for the longest tim shes hated. And then months ago i asked R. to the used concert and she priomised yes until N asked her and now shes not going at all.