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Saint Jimmy

This music video is probably one of the best I've seen. I really love the story, the acting, and obviously the music behind it (and the band that wrote the music of course. I love Greenday <3)
This song just...describes what a lot of kids go through. Kids who are different or outcast. Its just a great song and video :3

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holy mother fucking shit this is fantastic.

Pencey Prep live. Its Franks old band before he joined MCR (after Pencey broke up of course.)
But holy. mother. fucker. This is amazing. I've listened to a ton of Pencey Prep with their studio songs, but I've never seen a video of them live and OMYGOD. Frank's screaming and total spazzing! And his fucking HAIR! Omydearjesus! Speaking of hair, HELLO Mr. Ray Toro. Jesus Christ your FRO!
This video just made me respect Frank and Ray even more as musicians. They both get so into the music and just...they're both SO EPICLY TALENTED! Its amazing. I'm going to go watch it again.

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Why can't everyone just leave us the fuck alone?

So going to a Catholic school can suck. It can suck really, really bad.
People pick on you, make fun of you if you're different. Call you goth, call you emo, they call you depressed and they laugh at you just to make it worse. People throw pencils at your heads, and even at one point someone threw a metal screw at me. It almost hit my eye.
People call us names, they laugh at you when misfortune comes your way, they are homophobes who don't know that love is love.
All these things have happened to me. I am trying to just brush it all aside, push it off like it doesn't matter, but it really does. Every time someone calls my name or shoves me into a locker door or laughs at me when I stumble over my words, it hurts. But I'm getting better at not caring what people think, though it still hurts.

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People, seriously, stop leaking songs.

So apparently someone leaked CW 3 too. Seriously, people, is it that hard to just WAIT when the band is ready to release them? I have not listened to the new songs yet, and am planning to just wait until MCR release them on youtube, but I'm not mad at anyone who has listened to the leaks. I'm mad at the people who leaked them in the first place. I just feel like its a HUGE disrespect to the band. You are stealing their art. You are stealing the songs they wrote. You are stealing their words, their melodies, and you are putting them out into the world before the band meant for them to be ready. I think its extremely, just EXTREMELY disrespectful.

So, I just got back to school after a really long winter break. We all know that after a long break, its hard to get back into the swing of things. Especially school. I got back into the week with my grades at mostly B's and A's, but then I find out that I have a C+ in my math class and a C- in French. That did NOT go over well with my mom.
At all.

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My dad is talking to me like I'm a friggen client. I hate it.

My dad is talking to me like I'm one of his fucking clients. Its really, REALLY pissing me off. His voice is like a strangers to me right now. He's talking about how I must 'plan and prepare for my future' and how he's making me write a list of goals out for the year. I don't have a problem with setting goals for the year. New Year's resolutions are perfectly fine. But when my dad is still in his suit, with folders and his business voice, I just...I can't friggen handle him treating us like WORK. Me and my sister were sitting there just looking down at the table while my dad gave us his lecture. Nancy (my older sister) went to shut off her iPod and my dad just snapped at her and got angry and got all red.
Through that whole conversation with us, I wanted to punch my dad in the face.

This. THIS. This song, omydearjesusmotherofmaryfuckingchrist. ITS SO BEAUTIFUL. Best rendition of this song ever. Anne Hathaway, HOW ARE YOU SO GOOD?!?!

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It's all I can get when I'm lonely, and these visions of death seem to own me

In the quiet of the classrooms
All across the stacked United States of Woe.
We live with woe.

She said "I can't get laid in this town
Without these pointy fucking shoes.
My feet are so black and blue and so are you."
Please take me out of my body
Up through the palm trees
To smell California in sweet hypocrisy.
Floating my senses surround my body.
I wake my nose to smell that ocean burn.

So now I'm forging ahead
Past all the plutocrats who sold me out.
Go sob in your bed.
If life is twice as pretty once your dead
Then send me a card.
I'm still the optimist though it is hard
When all you want to be
Is in a dream.

Say Anything, along with my chem, as some of the most genius lyrics in the entire world. This song fits me perfectly at the moment.

So, last night I couldn't sleep.
At all.
At. Fucking. All.
I tried, oh yeah, I TRIED, but every time I looked towards the closet or the corner or straight in fucking front of me, I'd be cornered by shadows. Monsters. Nightmares. Every little thing that could hurt me. I couldn't deal with it. I started to hyperventilate, and so I texted Taylor (my amazingly understanding girlfriend) and I texted her until she promptly fell asleep. And then I texted my friend PJ, when then ALSO fell asleep. I started to panic because all the dark was closing in again, and I had nothing to distract me and I seriously was about to have an anxiety attack and those are NOT fun, and so I whipped out my iPod and read.
I read for about 5 fucking hours. Not a wink of sleep, not even a rest to comfort me til morning, just me wide awake and left to my own devices.

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Three cheers to a new year, and goodbye to the shitiest year ever.

Hip hip, HOORAY!
Hip hip, HOORAY!
Hip hip, HOORAY MOTHERFUCKERS!

*downs shot glass filled with whiskey, salutes, A-FUCKING-MEN!*

So this is a goodbye to one of the shitiest years of my life (besides 2005) and hello to a new year that will (hopefully) be better than the last one. In all honesty, I can't even remember most of this year. It's all kind of a haze to me. I remember all the REALLY fucking bad stuff, but in all honesty, that's pretty much it. Maybe it's better that way, to have no memory of the worst year of my life.
Even if I can't remember specifics, I CAN determine how bad this year was, which, I've determined, it was pretty damn terrible, but nothing has beaten 2005/2006 yet.
Anyway, highlights from 2012!

1. I got over SH.
2. I dumped my (now ex) boyfriend who cheated on me and who was all KINDS of clingy and desperate.
3. I got a fucking AMAZING girlfriend who hopefully will be my girlfriend for a long time