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I don't know what to do anymore....

I have such a headache.. The same images keep playing in my head. If you are curious to what they are, read the poem.

I don't know what to do. I am so tired and can't sleep. I don't want to try to be happy anymore.

I should probably go to a hospital again, or something. But they don't really help. I don't want to take drugs ever. I'd rather just die than take drugs.

I know this probably isn't the best place to find help, especially with a serious condition like mine. Nothing anyone can say will make anything better.

I don't know what to do anymore.

A wonderful life..

I was laying there, when I knew, I had to go buy some rope.

I went to the store, made sure that it was thick to support and not break.

I walked out to the old dirt road, the one where the old oak tree grows. So strong in its life, the beauty of its might. The wind blows gently as the leaves fall around me.

I climbed the old oak tree, for there I would wait and see, across the fields, watching as the days go by.

I wrapped the rope around the strong limb. The limb was large enough to hold at least three. Perhaps more, if more were to want to swing beside me in the old oak tree.

The smell of the

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 37

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 36: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

Suddenly as if the storm had ended and god himself had descended onto the earth, a bright flash of light flooded the earth. I couldn't see anything, the heat was intense. I hid under a desk, closed my eyes, and had to even cover my ears. The light was so bright it was like I could hear it. A sharp note struck so high that it sounded like my ears were going to bleed.

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 36

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 35: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

“I WILL NEVER LOSE AGAINST A DRAC!” She yelled out as she stepped up onto the large Drac's fist and used it to push herself high into the air.

Thrill Killer came back down with heel drop on to top of the big Drac's head. Dropping her other heel into his shoulder. She used the leverage of her heel on the shoulder to kick back upward and kicking him in the chin. This did more damage.

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 35

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 34: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

I continued on walking through the desert, just listening to the radio. I kept thinking about everything in my head. Everything I hated about all that has happened in the world and all that has happened in my life. Why did I even try.. why do I keep surviving..

I kept walking with no direction. The sun was burning my face and hands.

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 34

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 33: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

“Holy Shit!” Electric Night and I said in unison as I removed the helmet.

“Oh my god! She's fucking hott!” Electric Night said staring wide-eyed at the gorgeous dark haired girl. Her hair was long black with a purple highlight running down the front. It went down straight and ended in big curly locks. Her skin was like was caramel, soft and sweet. Her lips where full and painted with a star.

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 33

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 32: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

The van sped up driving in the direction of the only gas station left out in the wasteland. Surprisingly, gasoline was the one resource still being supplied by an unknown source. It was a well armored fortress and the only way to get more was to barter with the merchants. Who usually wanted more than just property.

The Scarecrow car sped closer, the laser fire took out the driver side mirror.

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 32

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 31: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

“I got us some back up, they should be here shortly.” Thrill Killer said over the radio to the van.

Three Scarecrow cars chased closed behind. They were looking to get the backup they needed.

“I hope they come quick, I can't be running out in this desert all day, I need to go fill up the baby with juice. We are seriously running low and only have the spare tank to get us to the station if we run dry.”

FANFICT: A Wanderer from the Negative : PAGE 31

Read these first:
Pages 1-20: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/not-so-many-readers-i-hoped
Page 30: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/evanblack/fanfict-wanderer-negativ...

A shadowy figure moved quickly past the window.

“Did you see that?” I said to Electric Night, as I looked out through the glass.

“Yeah! I really fucked that guy up!” Electric Night said laughing as he played his video game.

“I'll be right back.” I said walking out of the room. He didn't seem to interested in what I was doing, and I wasn't really sure if I saw anything in the first place.

Hey

Can someone help me dig a grave, I need a place to sleep tonight.

The water is so cold when you are swimming for your life.

Dirty hands can never compare to worn soles.

Pain is all I know I don't want to bring you with me.

The fire is so cold after another fight.

So well someone please,

Can someone please help me dig this grave because I need a need a place to sleep tonight.

Death my lovely friend, embrace me, hold me close, keep me warm, and never let me go.

A sleeping killer waits inside, when will you be free.

A fiendish lover,these pills will never make it alright.

So will someone

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