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Time to cry time to die time to say good bye?

fellow killjoys, say it isnt so say it isnt true! they who saved my life are killing their band? for reasons unsaid? how can this be? somebody please tell me this is nothing more than a nightmare that we are all sharing.

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Life Is Slowly Turning Around

So how odd is this: out of the blue i get a message from my xbff's xbf who is in the army now (good movie with pauley shore) and misses me as much as i miss him. im not sure how that makes me feel except that im getting happier each time he and i talk. and he's been more supportive of ALL my decisions than my parents. how messed up is that? especially since he and i haven't talked since freshman year of highschool. HELP!

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St. Valentine's Day

I have discovered that though I might be alone on this dreaded holiday for the eighth time in my life that it doesn't matter. Why? It is simple really. When you think about it, why do you need someone special to have a good time on St. Valentine's Day? This is the eighth year that i have been dumped or ditched just before the day arrives. I don't care anymore. To me it just translates to they are not good enough for me. At least that's what I like to believe. I have also discovered that there are millions of people who spend this holiday alone. So I'm happy with myself because I know even when I'm alone, I'm never trully alone. St. Valentine's Day is what YOU make of it. So make the best of it ladies and gentlemen because you are never trully alone. Happy Valentine's Day
from The Cure

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V-day Opinions.

I want everyones opion on this oh so popular holiday. so please post your opinion. Thank you!!!

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To whoever poisoned my Quasadilla: THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!

Ok so after taking the wonderful and truthfully helpful advice of PSEUDONYM BLUE, I have decided to revamp my life and take it in a new direction. Which means return to the fine arts of drawing; painting; writing poems, stories, songs; learning various languages to better insult people who piss me off; cooking <3 ; and amongst other things such as returning to reading comics; manga; anime; various books; daydreaming; and just random bullshit I call fun. 02/06/13 I get my phone back yay! my folks payed my bill for since my paycheck has been substantially low of late but now my paycheck is back to normal. Finally. Lol I really miss some of my friends from Waynesville High School, Waynesville, Missouri. They always knew what to say to make me smile. To make me laugh, cry, and hell even fight. One in particular has stuck by me for three years. Dated me twice. And even dealt with some really dangerous mood swings due to medication my junior (his sophomore) year.

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Chillin at the library

Ok so I'm chilling at the library listening to Skrillex Bangarang and there is a two really loud obnoxious high schoolers sitting at the computers across from me. Naturally I want to tell them to shut the fuck up but unfortunately I have screamed my self hoarse at the middle schoolers I serve lunch to. So it wouldn't do me any good. And now that I think about it I cant even hear Kyoto over them. What the hell is up with that. You're in a library shut up or quiet down. You are disturbing others. Lol but that's just my opinion. The invisible wall flower. Hahahahahahahahaha. I'm starving oh my god, I bought food today and I didn't even get to eat it. How messed up is that? Very. Extremely. Painfully. XD Oh I found out my best friend hates me and wants to get with my other best friend. Sucks don't it. Forever labeled as the sister. The friend. Always the Bridesmaid never the Bride. Which is bullshit in my opinion but whatever.

finally got something to listen to other than country in the car. it dont bug me but i get tired of it quick ya know? and now i can annoy my folks with it XD. GO SKRILLEX!!!!!!! lol i know im insane lol but i dont care. im feeling better after yesterday because of this its great for getting my blood pumpin and my body movin for boxing which allows me to vent thank god

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:'( well today couldnt get any worse

so i finally opened my heartto my best friend of 8 yrs and told him how i felt. he doesnt believe me and i just found out his ex wants to go back out with him and they are the best of friends. whats worse i think i know who hes gonna choose. and i cant blame him. shes pretty and smart and funny and has been there for him when i havent because i have been in missouri and now maryland. and it doesnt help that i just plain suck in comparision. i dont follow orders or anything else like that.RAWR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thats really all i want. to be held and allowed to do the one thing i havent been able to do for years. all thanks to an ex drilling in my head that crying is tired of staying up till 3-4 in the morning crying. i just want to be told everything is ok.... ya know? i just want someone to tell me that "Alles ist in der Liebe und im Krieg angemessen." and sometimes we just have to rely on others to get better. I need some real friends. People i ca trust. :/

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Thank You So Much

MCR you guys are my heros. I have been listening to you guys for 7 years now, and I gotta say if it hadn't been for your music I would most likely be in a jail cell or in a coffin. I'm Not Ok really helped me through middle school and high school. And probably saved a few lives XD. Teenagers definitely helped me through my sophmore year being the new kid amongst people i somewhat already knew. your music helped me through a moment in my life where i seriously considered either killing a certain someone or myself. at one point i even considered running away. Welcome to The Black Parade and Famous Last Words have become as one person once put it my "chill" songs. Mama has become probably the only song i sing behind my moms back when she pisses me off (which is quite often if i do say so). on the 10th anniversay of my granny's death i gave a small performance of Helena to my entire high school, which scared the living shit out of me.