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Heartbroken and disappointed

Well here I am again, upset an hurt..... The guy I've been in love with for a year now is ignoring me and it's reaching my heart.

I'm better :)

Well I'm feeling alot better since I last blogged, I saw the guy I love who makes me happy, wentto band practice and watched pewdiepie videos :) can't wait to start my first day of college on Tuesday and to start my job on Monday, things don't seem as gloomy as I thought they were thank you to MC army for helping realize were one big family love you guys hope y'all have a great day


I feel alone and like things don't matter, I miss my dad alot and I've been super depressed and the people around me don't seem to care. I wish I never felt this way, I wish alot of things were different, if there's any killjoy out there that can help pull me ou of this funk please do I'm in need of a hero, or at least someone to talk to without judgement. I wish life wasnt hard and that I could listen to this band without bawling my eyes out... I want to be me again

this is it

this is it im a week from graduation and i cant believe its happening. its been a while since ive been on here and alot had happened i lost my dad in january and have been in a deep depression and the only thing that helps is this band, and now that they broke up i still listen to them but it will never be the same i hope the killjoy nation is doing well felt like saying hi love yall


man i missed my killjoys what is happening???? well i am down to 7 months till graduation and senior year is AMAZING currently this killjoy is in powerlifting and growing stronger in my faith with Jesus christ my lord and savior... OH support team NO BULL and me cause my friends and i are making a anti bully video and plan on changing the who bullying world :)

9 and a half months till graduation 2K13

well i got 9 and a half months left till i graduate, im scared but im ready to do this. senior year is the best year ive had and im LOVING every minute of it... granted i have decided to no go to my homecoming dance cause i dont have a date and no money for a dress or ticket but ill watch a new movie or something... guess its cause the guy i am soooo in love with has a date and yet he can kiss me and make me feel wanted... i dont understand guys anymore and because of him i gave away my trust.... really hope one day i learn my lesson

fear overwhelms the mind, and the heart is the deepest ocean in Gods kingdom

well its been a while since ive blogged, guess ya could say that its been a busy time for me... i started my senior year august the 22nd and its going great but something makes me feel empty and scared inside.... the feeling that im growing up is overwhelming cause ive already filled out college apps and its crazy i dont know if im ready to grow up yet, and i sit here thinking about my mom and how much i miss her :'( even though i found Gods grace it still feels empty and i think i ruined it cause i told her off and it was only cause i was upset that life is difficult and i cant afford to

ignorance is her bliss

my friend feels sorry for me b/c i dont have a boyfriend and because the guy i like isn't dating me UMMMMMM (hope to not offend anyone with boyfriends or girlfriends) but a boyfriend dont solve any issue with life yeah they are there and everything but they are temporary him to boyfriEND im sick of the pitty face like this one :/ when i say IDK bout this guy i really like. and if she is soooo ignorant to say shell break up with him b/c hes a perv then the next day say I LOVE HIM shows how much of a hypocrite she is and if that is a relationship i dont want any part of it

this is what firefighters do :) CHILL AT HOME IN YOUR BUNKER JACKET

How are all you awesome killjoys out there? Well its Friday the 13th so stay clear of all things bad luck, im sooo tired but two cups of coffee (love coffee) and the holy grail and my firefighter jacket have kept me from wanting to sleep, so im gonna lay here till i pay for my trumpet and try to learn black parade by ear maybe some GREEN DAY TOO have a great friday killjoys LOVE AND ROCKETS RITALIN WILD


i no longer need to see my therapist because well, i dont feel the sadness of my moms abandonment no longer, it took two signs from God above to show me its time to move on and live my life to the fullest GOD and MCR are my life savors and im proud of the signs he has given me and proud to have MCR as the band to make my life worth living proving that music heals the soul :) i did it killjoys IM VICTORIOUS