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chpeverill-conti's blog

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Gender identity

Hey guys,
So now I'm seriously questioning my gender. My girlfriend has been very supportive of me, and has helped me open my mind. I wasn't always this way. When I was little, I thought I was half boy half girl. But other than that I was very girly. Up until I was in about fifth grade, that is. But then, things began to change. I started liking dresses less and less, and I stopped wishing for long hair (my mother had always cut it short). I realized that I identified as a homosexual. Now, or since 7th grade, I'm not sure if the term 'lesbian' fits me.

Stay strong, MCRmy

Attention: All My Chemical Romance fans who have begun to give up. PLEASE TAKE A MINUTE OUT OF YOUR DAY TO READ THIS AND PASS IT ALONG.
We have to have to HAVE TO keep this fandom alive. Everyone is abandoning it. We can't give up. My Chemical Romance is still a part of my heart. The role plays are dying, the fan fictions are dropping, the radio stations aren't getting requests for them anymore, it's sad. If you loved MCR as much as I did you wouldn't abandon it and leave it to die. Gerard said "MCR is gone, but it can never die." Its alive in US. We have to stay strong!

I'm Scared

My heroes are gone... what will I do when I post a blog on here and there's no one here to reply. When I'm the only one left. When everyone else moves on, and I'm stuck in my own little solitary world here.
What about when things don't get better. What do I do then?
I'm just not okay. And I don't know what to do. My friends must hate me, I'm always so depressing to be around. I'm going to end up losing them all, but I don't care anymore. I'm done. I feel empty. Lost. Useless. My girlfriend, I don't know how she's still happy. She's so happy. Always happy, radiating true happiness.

For Lonestar

reblog this message from wherever you read it on any site at all, so if she goes online at all, she will see our message. please go along with this idea, I really want lonestar to see that we care. use, here, facebook, twitter, tumblr, deviantart, message it to her, just get this across to her, so she WILL see it, and know we care about her, and that she has soooo much to live for. it's been too long without her, she needs to return to the zones!! also add your killjoy name to the bottom of this blog when you reblog, so she can see how many people care. :)

xxx we love you lonestar xxx

My weight is being weird

I don't know how (well, actually I do but I'll get to that later), but in the past 3 weeks I've lost 14 lbs. WHAT?!?! It's kinda terrifying cause I was 105 lbs and now I'm 91 lbs. I'm also 5 foot 1.5 inches. Is this unhealthy? I think I lost the weight because I eat a waffle for breakfast, and dinner. Some days I'll have a snack if I get hungry, but I usually don't. My girlfriend told me that since I'm post-anorexic, my stomach is small and I need to stretch it out. I want to gain weight, but I don't like eating. I just don't.


Hey guys,
So I recently put my finger on what I've been feeling since 6ish grade. I am gender queer. Today at WAGLY (my GSA) I said my pronouns were they/them/their. It felt so great to get that out in such a safe environment.
Today I tried to bind with an ace bandage, but then it hurt too much so I had to take it off :(
Because of this, I think I'm going to get a REAL ftm binder. Does anyone know of any good brands? I use amazon. I know about underworks but I want to look at all my options.
Anyways, it's been so great to express myself.

X marks the spot

Today is my birthday and I'm hanging out with friends. I should be happy. But I'm not. I feel as though I've been marked with a big black X.This always happens to me, I end up feeling like shit and I wish I didn't have to think.
- Z

Spanish thoughts 9/12

I'm in Spanish class and mega bored, so why not be productive and post a bog. What are you guys up to, and how are you? But honestly, no pretending you're OK. Are you really OK? If you are or aren't, I don't care. I still want you to inbox me. I want to make sure you all know that you matter to me. Every single one of you. If you're having a rough day or need someone to talk to, I'm always here. The MCRmy helped me, so I'll help every last revenger. Never forget that you're strong and asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of wanting to get better.

User name change/what's up

Hey guys,
Is there any way I can change my username on this site? I want it to be my killjoy name (Cosmic Constellation) But If you can change the user name, can someone please tell me how? Thanks :)
My friend set me up on a blind double date (herself, Her boyfriend/my best friend, and one of her friends she thinks I'd be good with) for friday. I'm talking to the girl now. Her name is Monica, and she's actually really cool. She likes Aerosmith and the Ramones, crafty like me, and also pretty nerdy with love of HP and musicals. We have a lot in common, and I like her.

In honor of Mikey's birthday

Since it is Mikey's birthday, here I am in school dressed like him, glasses and all. Even though I don't usually wear them. Happy birthday!
- Z