When she woke up she saw Mikey and Gerard talking to each other frantically. Mikey looked over at where Savanna had just been lying on a three chairs and did a double take when he saw her sitting up. He got up and pulled Gerard up behind him, pulling his brother across the room. “Hey are you okay?” Mikey asked with his forehead wrinkled in concern. “Yeah… I think…” Savanna stammered. She saw that Gerard had a bloody nose.
Ray had to try to calm her down while she had a coughing/laughing fit. All the guys got a little bit worried and they tried to make her stop. They ended up on the floor lying down staring up at the ceiling in a sort of cliché circle of newly found friends. Bob was the first one to ask the question that she knew she would have to answer eventually: “Why are you here?” The others sat up and looked at her as if they were all contemplating that very question. “I see things and they make me angry. I scream, I break things and I hurt myself.” She muttered quietly.
Ray, Bob and Mikey congregated with them facing Savanna and the sketchpad. On the page was an almost perfect likeness of Frank. He was standing there with his hair going down the side of his face and his tattoos clear on his arms. His lip ring glinted in a stream of light coming from an unknown source and shadows swirled around him in the background. They exchanged glances and looked back to Savanna who was now trying as hard as she possibly could to blend in with the wall. They all slowly started to sit down around her.
It was very quiet and awkward in the common room now. No one spoke until the little dude stood up and half-walked, half-bounded across the room to her. Everyone was watching him including her. He offered her his hand accompanied by a small, friendly grin and a “Hi…I’m Frank…Frank Iero.” She took his hand cautiously and shook with him. “I’m Savanna… Savanna Griffin…” She returned his gaze a little more confidently adding her own small, shy smile. Frank nodded happily and returned to his spot near his friends. He looked at them expectantly.
They finally pulled up to a white building with a big sign. She struggled too much when they got her out of the car to see what it said. She writhed about trying to escape their binding grip on her arms and shoulders. She wasn’t insane. She was finally forced through the doors and sat down in a chair in a long white hallway. She blocked out the muttering as they signed her in. She was taken into a white room with an observation window and two female nurses. She was checked for tattoos and self-harm marks.
She woke up in the middle of the night… a nightmare was the least of her problems. She sat up in her aunt’s guest bed but was immediately pushed back down… she was scared because she couldn’t see anything… ”Why did you have to run? Why did you have to get me killed? If it weren’t for you I wouldn’t be here! Why are you so selfish?” hissed a voice that she recognized as her mother’s. “No! It wasn’t my fault!” she cried out to the empty room. “If I had stayed I would have been killed too! You tried to follow me!
“ Get your fucking hands off me!” she snarled, her voice low and dangerous. Her father didn’t seem to notice and launch into “What the fuck are you doing listening to your parents private conversations? You are just a little…” she cut him off before he could say another word. “ NOW YOU ARE GOING TO FUCKING LISTEN TO ME! YELLING AT MY MOTHER SO LOUD THAT I CAN HERE YOU DOWN THE STAIRS BEHIND A CLOSED DOOR IS NOT A FUCKING CONVERSATION!” she barked “YOU ARE A SLOVENLY DRUNK WHO IS NOT MY FUCKING FATHER! YOU ARE NOT MY PROBLEM ANY MORE!
“Don’t just don’t,” she spat “I know you want me to be someone I’m not and that’s enough. I have my own problems I’m not bearing yours. Find another scapegoat… dad…” She glared at him one last time before she ran away. She would have had to slap him across the face to make those words sting any more but she didn’t care and he didn’t follow her. He just sat there in a drunken stupor. She ran into her room and slammed the door. She grabbed her sketchbook, pencil, and iPod and jammed her earphones into her ears. She started drawing and she didn’t stop.
Have you ever:
1) Self harmed?
2) Got into a real fight?
Yes I got a black eye and scar on my ankle
3) Been too depressed to move out of your bed?
4) Tried to commit suicide?
No but I have thought about it before
5) Had to lie to EVERYONE about how you felt?
Yes, many times
6) Watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting?
7) Talked yourself out of serious trouble?
8) Accused someone of using you?
No...unless my mom counts
10) Gotten drunk/high?