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Why?

Why do you think that they can't trust others?
Why do you think that they can't be close to others?
Why do you think that they cry?
Why do you think that they lie?
About how they feel?
How can they deal?
With all that they go through?
Do I need to show you?
The scars?
That mar?
The surface of my skin?
The knife that cut in?
That show that I feel?
That show that I'm real?
Do I need to show you?
The things that I told you?
About my life?
About my strife?
To be who I am?
To be who I am?

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I'm not insane chapter 15

They asked her so many questions that she thought that she was going to explode. After a while Gerard seemed to pick up on this. He looked around at the others and said, “Give the chick some space!” Savanna laughed and Ray stuck his tongue out at Gee. Frank giggled. Mikey crossed his eyes and made a face because he felt left out. Bob rolled his eyes. “I am surrounded by incompetent fools…besides you Sav…” Savanna laughed and tackled Frank who was giving Gee bunny ears. “Nope me too!” Bob smiled shyly and said, “Yup… I guess we all are.” Frank giggled and bit Savanna’s hand while struggling to get away. She boxed his ear and rolled him over, wrestling on the ground. Mikey laughed. “I guess you’ve finally met your match Frankie!” Frank glared at him playfully and looked up at Savanna who had him pinned on the ground. “Can I kill him now?” Sav laughed and shrugged. “If you want to try then I would love to watch!” Mikey looked at her with playful anger in his eyes.

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I'm not insane chapter 14

They looked really worried and Mikey’s eyes found the marks on her face. “I… I saw…” Savanna’s eyes widened. “You saw it too?” She looked so hopeful. Maybe she wasn’t insane after all. “No…” Mikey said. He winced a little as her hope turned back to sorrow. “I saw the unmistakable pain on your face…” Frankie ran in with the nurse who helped her up and gasped. “What? How did this happen?” All the guys heard Sav as she was helped out the door. “You wouldn’t believe me.” Her voice was filled with sorrow and exhaustion. The nurse dressed her wounds and sent her off to the doctor who asked about them. Sav told him her story and winced at the small laugh that she received in return. Soon she was back in her room eating from a small tray that Bob had brought her. He sat with her and they talked. She had to stay in her room and rest because the nurse had informed the staff that she was not to be up. The guys sometimes wandered in to talk to her or watch her draw.

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I'm not insane chapter 13

Mikey looked down at her in shock and pain but his shock was nothing compared to the marks that she had left on his neck. He hugged her protectively and wondered who she thought he was and whether or not he could kill them for messing with his friend. Savanna blushed a little as they parted from each other but her eyes were wide and her voice was low and pitiful. “Fuck, I’m so sorry! I…I…I know…” Mikey looked at her with eyes that were still slightly frightened and said, “ I’ve dealt with this before… It’s going to be okay.” Those words were the wrong things to say. Savanna’s cheeks went from pink to pasty white, her embarrassed smile twisted into a grimace and eyes stared at him with utter hate. “Don’t ever say those words to me.” Her voice was quiet but assertive. Her tone would have burnt into Mikey’s heart if they could. Sav turned from him and began to stalk towards the door when a firm hand gripped her arm.

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I'm not insane chapter 12

She didn’t feel like explaining so she simply slumped down in her chair and through her head down on the table. Sav’s hair fanned out from behind her head and it looked as if she was lying in a stream of black. The guys seemed to get the message and didn’t press her. She wished that the nurses hadn’t taken her chains… she would have felt so much better with the cold metal pressing against her skin. Savanna wished that her parents would go away and not come back. She wished that everything would just stop. She wished she could leave this goddamn place. It seemed that none of her wishes came true…except for the one that she had made as an elementary schooler. She remembered the first time that a bully had pushed her into a wall… the memories of the repetition of this simple action played over in her mind and she remembered how this action had followed her through her life to here. She remembered her desperate plea to anything that was listening… and now she had friends…right?

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Who am I like

Who am I most like?

Gerard Way:
[] Born in April
[] You've been addicted to alcohol and/or drugs
[x] Born a leader
[x] You love drawing
[x] You love singing
[x] You don't take crap from anyone
[x] You're afraid of needles
[x] You call your friends by their last names instead of their first
[x] You have siblings and love them
[] You have brown/green eyes

Mikey Way:
[] Born in September
[] You play bass
[x]You don't have asthma
[] You are near-sighted
[] You wear glasses
[x] You've had the urge to stick a fork in the toaster
[x] Seen as the little kid amongst your family and friends
[x] You are the youngest sibling
[x] Skinniest in your group of Friends
[] You stuck a heater in the shower

Ray Toro:
[] Born in July
[x] You play guitar
[x] You have a scar on your head
[] You can't swim
[] You've got a fro
[] You're 6'1"
[x] You're shy
[] You wear contact lenses
[x] You're called the mastermind or the quiet genius

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I'm not insane blog update

Hey guys, I am currently working on the next I'm not insane chapter and if you have read the others please tell me your ideas. If you have anyone that you want to make an appearance in the next chapter or an idea about something that would raise the stakes please tell me. Thank you. :P

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I'm not insane chapter 11

As they left the room together they were both silent but they nodded to each other and waved at Bob and Ray as they emerged from a room down the hall. Frank and Gee join them from another hall and they chattered softly on the way to the cafeteria. They ate breakfast together and Savanna thought about the family breakfasts that her parents used to hold back when they even pretended to love her… Her aunt wanted nothing to do with her anymore and her sister was off in college. She was alone. Her friends seemed to notice her mood and they leaned in with concern. Bob and Frank were beside her and they each put one of their hands on one of her shoulders. “Fuck are these guys like telepathic or some shit?” thought Sav, as she looked around at all the worried faces. As she looked at Mikey she noticed her own reflection in his glasses. She had two immediate thoughts.

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I'm not insane chapter 10

Savanna was surprised to see Mikey sitting on a bed by a small window. Mikey turned with surprise carved into his face. He soon replaced the confusion with a look that said, “Finally, company!” Once Mikey had helped Sav put her stuff into the small closet that they would be sharing they sat down on the beds and talked. Mikey had a nice voice even though he tended to listen a lot. Mikey was still listening when he thought; “Wow she would be a great singer if she got the chance… just like Gee…” It was true. Savanna’s voice was sweet and low for a girl. It was breathy and full of emotion. She had never thought that she was anything special, but Mikey did. He felt a bit selfish and wished that she wouldn’t leave to soon. Sav was the first person he could really relate to in this place besides Gerard… and Gee was his brother so that didn’t count. So Mikey just sat there and listened adding to the conversation when he could find something to say.

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I'm not insane chapter 9

At one point her body tensed and her mouth opened and she looked as if she were screaming silently but otherwise she was still and quiet. In the morning she had another meeting with her doctor who reported to her the activity she had witnessed the past night. She was given her quarters but she was not to enter them yet. Chances were her roommate was still asleep. She changed into a pair of faded black pants that once had chains attached to them but they had been unclipped by the nurses who said that they were against the House Rules because they could be used to hurt herself or others. She also wore a new pair of black hospital socks and a black t-shirt. What could she say? She really liked black. She was let into the common room and she found that only Ray and Bob were up. They both had bags under their eyes that proved that they too had been worrying about her last night. Ray was wearing a Grateful Dead shirt and blue jeans.