sighs exboyfreinds moveing across the country, cousdy battles i'll explain the rest in antoher blog tonight if you wish

well its a long story. last night i went to my old youth group i dont go no more because im not christain. and my exboyfreind was there i dident quite expect that. and at the end i was saying good bye to every one its a small youth group mayb 20 teens at the most and im freinds with every one so u was giveing hugs and final good byes. and well heres a poetic journal entry about it.
*He embraced me tight one last time and said even though you might hate me he huged ,e even tigher and wisperd in my ear i'll always love you...
At that seccond every stich in my heart ripped open leaveing my heart in two again,
broken and bleeding,
but at least im leaving
he's right i had to say goodbye to him. i couldent say good bye to every one else and not say good bye to him.
but ii could've left leaving him with out his last goodbye, did hederserve to embrace me one last time?
i should've just egnored him with a cold heart why dident i just do that?
but he huged me b4 i could say no.
i turned around and then BAM! i was in his arms one last time.
now im bleeding inside. he apoligised to me.
realising he should've treated me better and that i derserved better.
numb. i feel numb.. i accepted his apolgie but did he derserve that too?
every one deserves forgiveness but so so soon?
he realised how beatiful i am, he reaalised i was the best thing in his life and he treated me like dirt and that i derserved better. and how i will be gone forever out of his life.

i'll explain later