B is for Badass

Hola my killjoy brethren.
So how was Christmas for you guys? Did you all get a lot of nice black t-shirts?
Well, I did. And I can't lie, I was kinda surprised when I did. Mother Dearest has been against me this whole time.
Her mantra:You need a little colour in your life. Nag nag nag. Whatever.
But I think she's finally got it into her skull that this is not a stage. In 3 years, I'll be the same or "worse".
Oh and I got a fucking electric guitar. I cant stress how awesome that is. Even though I can't play for shit..
Oh! And turns out I was playing it wrong this whole time.
Well bollocks to you guitar app and thank god for YouTube.

Yours psychotically,
Jab

P.S. Are there any Wiccans on here? I have a few questions if you don't mind answering them...