2014: "I'm learning to live without them. That's not necessarily a bad thing - it's just growth."

It's been more than a year since I posted on this site. It's not from a lack of post-worthy information or experiences, but rather a feeling of disconnect from this band and this fan base.

I've always felt like the MCRmy is one huge family, and it is, but lately it's as if I've moved overseas for a new job - struggling to keep up relationships because you're so far away.

I listen to at least one MCR song a day, and most of the time the Greatest Hits CD is playing in my car, but everything sort of washes over me. I'm listening, but I'm not hearing, so to speak.

This band has been part of my life for seven years, but since they disbanded I've felt myself drift away from them and their music. I become numb when I hear them. Even the guys' solo projects aren't reaching me. If anything, they push me further away. I'm proud of them and what they're achieving, don't get me wrong, but it just doesn't feel the same. Different can be good, but this kind of different just doesn't work for me.

I guess, considering my age, the things I'm working towards now, and how much I used to rely on My Chemical Romance for support, I'm learning to live without them. That's not necessarily a bad thing - it's just growth. Instead of being at the forefront of my mind like they used to be, they've shifted to the depths of my heart - they're still there, still important, but not my priority.

I want to try to reconnect, though. I want to be able to hear them again, and I think that is something I'll start working towards over the coming weeks. Big changes are coming my way and I want MCR to be there for them, just like they were there through the good, the bad, and the ugly aspects of my teen years.