pathetic that i am crying alone...

so i just wiped away tears that mean a lot.i started crying in the lonely dinning room where the house computer is. i held on to a stuffed animal i have in here n just let tears run down my face. i had to stop cause i heard my dad coming. but i feel like shit. i shouldnt be crying and ive grown up taught not to show my emotions. right now i really wanna just count out but my friend would hate me 4ever,n its selfish :/ but i really dont feel too good.