Long Time No ... Blog? Number Three Leaves Me A Mess! <3 Much Love For It Though!

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Long Time No ... Blog? Number Three Leaves Me A Mess! <3 Much Love For It Though!

Now it's been a while since I was on here last and unfortunately I do not come back with a positive post, however it's more of a thank you to MCR and to my Dad for being so amazing and a massive influence on me this year. This post is about my Grandma, Pamela, who I was unfortunate enough not to have met.

My Grandma committed suicide in 1996, one year before I was born, she attempted to commit suicide when my Dad was 15 through a drug overdose, she was not addicted to drugs, her reason behind her wanting to tke her life was down to the feeling of not being loved as she had just gotten divorced and her children, my Dad and Auntie, had grown up and left home. I've been told that I am very much like her, which is brilliant because I've been told that she cared more for others than herself and was very beautiful.

This year my Dad decided to tell me about his life growing up, putting into perspective how much he went through compared to how much I think I'm gowing through. My Dad went through seeing his Mother endlessly in hospital and having the awful feeling of being on the otherside of the world at the time of his Mother needing him the most.

However I think my Dad is such an inspiration as he has been through quite a lot of low times, yet still manages to smile, carry on, and be optimistic. This year I would like to thank my Dad for being so brilliant, supportive and strong. I wish I could have some way of showing you how much of an inspiration you have been to me and how much of an impact you have made on my life after the realisation of your struggles.

And so I come to my thank you to MCR, the new songs off Number three, The World Is Ugly and The Light Behind Your Eyes, have really spoken to me. Although the songs may not necessarily be related to the topic of losing someone who was so lovely, they speak to me in the sense that the words can be minpulated to fit it. So thank you MCR for creating two beautiful songs that create ssuch an impact on me that they leave me a mess.

Suicide is a serious thing, and such a sad thing too, so my wish for the new year is that suicide and self harming become less of an issue, and my way of contributing to this wish and helping it come true is by raising money for charities helping to combat these issues, such as young minds. I'll be doing this by selling home made t-shirts, CD's (an acoustic cover CD just by me and a CD created by me and two others in my music tech class, which will feature many different styles of music), raising money through my music BTEC course concert and perhaps by selling art in my local art museum or online. If any of you think you will be interested in these things, just let me know and we can arrange things, I will be displaying pictures and videos on here so if you're interested take a look and get in touch. One of my New Years Resolutions is to be less negitive and focus on the more positive aspects of things and be more supportive to others in order for them to also keep a positive frame of mind.

If you could be bothered to read all of this thank you to you for readig it all I do ramble on quite a bit, but this was something that was close to my heart this year and I am sure that I'm not the only one who feels the same. I'm sorry that this wasn't a very happy or exciting post.

Feel free to follow me on twitter @emily_shelayne :)

Once again thank you for reading if you could be bothered.

Stay safe and have a great New Year!