My Chemical Romance

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My Chemical Romance

Recently it has come to my attention because people are beginning to point it out, is that since the end of last term I have become happier. My English teacher from last year was possibly the first person to point it out to me, I didn't believe him at first because I didn't understand why I would look happier than I did the week before because I still felt really shitty about myself (still do). It wasn't really until today after my Mom said that I've been happier since the end of term three, that I actually noticed why I was looking happier, because in a way I am, I now have friends and people don't pick on me as much as they used to because they don't have the chance too. But what really hit me is that it was the end of term 3 that I started listening to My Chemical Romance again, by that point I hadn't been listening to them for almost 2 and a half years, believing that they were the reason I felt upset of the time, I had convinced myself that their music was actually my problem and that what I was feeling was because of them. I hid my love for their band since I was about 8 or 9 because I was so obsessed with being the person people thought I should be, someone who loved things like cheesy pop music and love songs, I was the ultimate girly girl for people who actually didn't give a shit, so when I went through and began to 'hate' MCR I became obsessed with people like Justin Bieber, I mean the kid is talented, he has a beautiful voice but I don't like that kind of music and I never have. I had forced myself to like that kind of music. So 9 weeks ago, right before Frank announced Conventional Weapons on his blog, I pulled out my old USB with their CD Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge on it and I began to listen to it. Over all that time I had completely forgotten why I loved this band in the first place, they made me feel okay , normal and safe. They had always given me the reassurance that it doesn't matter what others say because they felt the same way and they got through it. This band made everything better for me and the way people treated me made me think other wise, because of people I could have died because I felt like I had no one, I could have killed myself, I cried myself to sleep for two years because I thought it was the band ruining my life when it was everyone else. My Chemical Romance saved my life and I didn't even know. Someone had to point this out to me, they may not have said those exact words but after I started listening to my favorite band again, someone saying "You look happier now" was really a slap in the face. They might of thought it was because I actually started talking to people, or had gotten into a relationship. But relationships have never been something I've needed to be happy. I needed someone who understood. I needed My Chemical Romance.