We all crash and burn.

So that blog about being happy without Jonathan?
Fuck it. Forget I said anything.

I was SO FUCKED UP then entire time we were broken up.
I didn't eat or sleep AT ALL for 12 days.
I stopped talking and wouldn't even look at my dad.
I was a fucking mess.

So when he asked me out again, and I wanted to say no SO BAD, I couldn't do that.

He's my life. Jonathan and Lauren are now what my life revolve around.
I would literally die without them.

So dear, I need you to understand that I won't do that to myself again. I won't go through the pain that I went through ever again. I have a constant pain in my stomach from that experience that will never go away. My stomach started to digest itself.... If you were the friend you said you are, you wouldn't want me to go through that. Yeah, I know that you don't like him, and I know that you think I'm going to get hurt. But really right now, you're the one hurting me. He's the first person to come into my life and make me totally happy. Ever. And you should be happy for me instead of wanting him gone. No one has a problem with him but you. You yell at him for the simplest of things, the things that you know I love about him. I can't handle hanging out with the two of you if all you're going to do is yell at him. Right now he means more to me than you do, and I'm really just fed up with trying to balance the two of you. Does he hit me and insult me all the time? Nope. But you do. He's what keeps the smile on my face, and if you don't like that then what kind of friend are you? Yeah I know, chicks before dicks. But he isn't a dick. And I don't think that complaining to your chicks about YOUR dick fits that rule. And I hang out with you EVERY GODDAMN weekend. Even when I don't want to. AND I see you every day. I see him once a week for a few hours. I'm going to make the best of those few hours. So thanks for never listening to how I feel about him, and thanks for taking the time to know what's going on in my head. Because all I ever hear about is your problems.
Sincerely, Me.