My Father

Lady Sparrow's picture

My Father

I cut badly with a razor yesterday. I feel bad because it had been a year and I'm seeing MCR in a week.

Anyway, about my dad--
So he's been drinking a lot lately and it really scares me. I wrote him a note, I wanted to get advice. Here's the note I wrote him:

Dad,
If I cut myself so bad I ended up in the hospital, would you try to stop drinking?
I've been wearing that necklace you gave me since last saturday. It means a lot because you gave it to me. I feel completely hopeless thinking about this. I feel so suicidal you have no idea. Remember how your dad got drunk and tried to shoot you when you were a kid, but didn't even remember?
I feel so sick. I've been crying my fucking eyes out for the past 1/2 hour.
I know you drink because you're in a lot of pain, but do you ever think of how bad it's hurting me?
I sincerely hope you will next time...
If you want to reply to me please write a note back. I can't bear to see you hungover and smelling like alcohol; and if I talked to you in person I'd completely break down.
My heart feels like its being stabbed.
I wish you'd go live with Uncle Randy once you and the woman get a divorce, because I know it would be better for you that Way.
Mom saw me crying and asked why I was making a scene and said living with me was a rollercoaster and she can't deal with me. Thanks for the fucking love and support, mom.