I stood out on the frozen lake, a hollow shell of the girl I once was. I wished the milky white layer of ice would crack and take me away from my misery. No one would miss me. I wouldn't even miss me. The ice looked so thin, so fragile. Much easier than trying to cover up something I did. I closed my eyes as I breathed in the chill of winter. I loved the cool filling my lungs and sending a shiver through my whole body. I sat down cross- legged and took off my heavy wool peacoat. I sat in my black shortsleeved shirt and examined the quilt of scars that blanketed my forearms. I remembered what each scar represented, what each divot in my skin meant to me. I heaved a sigh and lay down on the ice. I thought I heard a small 'crack,' but I passed it off as myself hearing things. Turns out I wasn't. I got my wish.
One minute I was laying on top of the lake, totally still, the next, I was inside a cold watery prison with brown sand swirling all around me. I unleashed the full power of my vocal chords and let out my reserves of air in what would've been a deafening scream, had I been above water. The muscles in my fingers and hands siezed up with the cold, and my torso followed suit. Suddenly, I felt some warmth penetrate the cold. Two hands yeanked me out of the water, allowing me to breahte again. I wanted this, but I didn't want it. I tried to fight as the guy I'd been crushing on since forever saved me from my death. He gently put me down on the bank of the lake and looked at me, fear in his eyes. Then he did something unexpected; I thought he was tring to save me, but he was kissing me. I let myself surrender to his warmth. It radiated through my body, warming my insides but not my outsides. When he pulled his lips off of mine he murmured an I love you. I tried to make myself respond, but nothing was working. I couldn't breathe, couldn't see, couldn't move anything. After a few moments being in this terrifying limbo, the black freezing cold nothingness won. I fell into the eternal warmth of death.
There was a slight pinch and I felt my soul being seperated from my body. I opened my eyes and saw him hunched over my former body. There were small tears in his eyes, a blank expression on his face. We faded out of my view as I was transported to a world where I could feel no pain, and he was transported to a world where all he could feel was pain.
part 2: http://www.mychemicalromance.com/blog/krazykatkilljoy/short-story
