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How Pathetic I am.

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KittyCatKilljoy's picture
on August 9, 2014 - 8:53pm

So today had been totally perfectly wonderful. Well, I wouldn’t exactly say wonderful, but being the incredibly lazy, antisocial, vampire-hermit music geek that I am, I don’t really feel like going back and changing that word, and because my brain is 99.999998% occupied and taken over by song lyrics and bands (the other small percentage is taken over by unicorns, fattening food, and chubby animals), it is really hard to come up and think of good words and synonyms to use, so I do apologize ahead of time for my lame choices of words….anyway, I am getting totally side tracked!
Okay, back to whatever I was trying to yeah, today had been alright, doing my usual like the sooooo totally cool and popular girl I am! Oh god the quilt is taking over me...please forgive me for lying! I am not exactly the most popular girl out there, all those “normal boring people” that think being messed up is well, uh, being messed up….they just don't appreciate the most amazing things in life, like, of course, MCR, and all the beautiful bands out there…….i’ll get my revenge soon, plus when I die ill be going to the black parade, where as all those awful “normals” that bully me will be suffering in the dark presence of people like Miley Cyrus and Nicki Minaj, yuck! Speaking of yuck, so apparently people call Miley Cyrus “punk”, UUUGGGHHHH it makes me sick.

OH MY GOSH! I am so completely sidetracked...i forgot what I was going to say! Hmmm….OH! I remember! Okay, so like most days, I like to block out the entire world around me and just listen to my music. So I was going through every song and album of MCR’s that I have on itunes, all in order of course, starting with Bullets, then after that album, Three Cheers, Black Parade, Danger Days, you know, and the few after that, until after rocking out and singing along to every one of my favorite songs (every. single. MCR song.) I made it to the last album May Death Never Stop You. I was fine until I got to their last song. Yup, Fake. Your. Death.

And that was when my mom opened the door to my bedroom to see me clutching my guitar and dramatically bawling on the floor, black makeup dripping down my face. And to make things worse, a few hours later, a certain horrible date appeared on my laptop….a horrendous date, just truly appalling. March. Twenty. Second. Of 2013. Its like I am being punished!!!!! WHY!?!?! Is it because I forced my kitty to play Welcome to the Black Parade on the piano!? Or physically forcing my friends and those around me to listen to and like at least one song of My Chem?! Or because of that time I named a ground squirrel Frerard and then realized that it had died...oh my gosh… died just like MCR did!!!! WAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! WHY DID THEY HAVE TO LEAVE US!?!?!?!

Okay, im going to suck it up and act like a normal, stable person who doesn't go mad (well, even more mad) when their favorite band breaks up. But really, the worst part about it, is that I didn’t even care all that much about them until it was too late. Sure, I liked their music, but I wasn’t absolutely obsessed like I am now, but I never got to see them live!!!! Never! And it KILLS me! If I could go back, I would shove a ton of MCR merch in my past-self’s face and make her love them, or um, make me...i guess thats how you'd put it…or i’d put it, again, back to the almost zero percent of usable brain….I just miss them so much. But I guess they are all doing wonderful, I mean, Gerard’s new song is amazing and I absolutely cant wait for his album! And Franks stuff too….everyone's doing great, except me, the girl who hasn't left the nice, darkness of her room and hasn't taken her headphones off almost all summer. Who needs things like food, water, and human interaction when i've got music!? Thats my brilliant theory. Oh, and cats. Ive got my kitties!!! I guess thats all I need, MCR and cats, I guess thats why I am a KittyCatKilljoy!