Sinking....

So I started talking to someone on here (like messaging them) and we had a really awesome conversation going and every morning and every afternoon before and after school i'd run home anxious to see his next message....well I'm really scared he doesn't want to talk to me anymore...or that he forgot me....(something happened)....so that's happening right now but also I'm starting to sink back down into the feeling of depression i was in about 1 month ago or so....and i don't want to go there again! I'm feeling suffocated all over again but just like last time its me that suffocates myself and I don't want to go back to cutting or any of that shit but I haven't been thinking straight and im really losing my footing (at home and school academically)....I don't want this to happen....I just can't afford to lose another person that I have come to see as a friend....
(I'm sorry for this post but I needed to get this off my mind and chest before I exploded...)