That's All Folks

KateMercedes's picture

That's All Folks

I'd like to start this how I start all my other some what personal blogs. If your interested go on reading and by all means leave a comment. If not just skim over and do all those annoying surveys we all do when we're bored.

This year could have been better. Though I admit that good must come with bad. My bad seemed to be more in abundance than any good.

Monetarily wise I'm set. College? Officially onto my third year. I have a goal for my future and I'm planning hard to make sure I become somewhat successful.

But that really isn't the problem. I always can rely on myself. I am my biggest supporter. I have never failed myself. And on the rare occasion that I do I whip myself back into shape, so to speak, and try again.

The problem is that I'm the only person I can rely on. And after almost four years with a man much older than I am I realize that the fairytale facade I tried so hard to create with him just wasn't possible. He wasn't compliant, stubborn, controlling, always guilting me. And eventually that led to more physical abuse after I've held my tongue for so long. So with a heavy heart I left him. Because I realized that he and the relationship was just not healthy for me and it was time to move on.

I just feel alone. Not for the fact that I don't have a man. But because of that man, I dropped my friends because I thought at the time he was all I needed. I was wrong....

Ugh I don't know where I'm going with this. I just feel lost and confused. Working out has helped. It's helped with sleeping. Yeah. I think I'll end it on that note lol