If At First You Don’t Succeed, Try Again
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In the finale, when all of the rights have gone wrong
And whatever the time is, is just too late
The fat lady would be singing her song
But she killed herself after she couldn’t lose weight
I’m slowly dying in my room and if I’m to be saved
You’ll need to climb through all the ignored suicide notes
There’s so much blood coating the floor that you might need a boat
And after pulling me down from the rope you’ll need to dig me outta my grave
After I hug my ugly imaginary friends in my head, I flick off the nightlight
And let the bedbugs bite me, bite me up from my thighs
Like in the outside world I’m eaten alive, without even putting up a fight
I’m dead only when the light leaves, light leaves my eyes
In this dead-silent mortuary; I’ve never felt more at home
And the most parenting man I’ve ever met is the mortician
One night he even brought down for me an ice-cream cone
Reminding me I’m still alive, that this is just a mere audition
There’s too much depending
On a life that’s never ending
Like when your suicide note’s status is “sending”
And the mass suicide has ten thousand attending
I spent all my time just watching the T.V.’s entertainment
But eventually I began to run behind on even those payments
Since nothing in the world is worth as much as laughter to suffice
I arranged for ‘em to get a limited-edition vid of my suicide half-price
I took all my money, went to the prank-shop and bought a noose
Since all life is, is just an unfunny practical joke; a kick to the eggs
So I jumped from an oak tree, but ended up only breaking my legs
‘Cause suicide was not its intentional use, and it was just too loose
I’m gonna prove to everybody that I can fly
Sure, I may fall to my death a moment after
But for just one split second I’ll close my eyes
And hear nothing at all but everyone’s laughter
I hear a noise as I climb onto my favorite chair
Noose in hand, I wait and ask, “Is anyone there”
Without an answer, I fall off it and lose my air
Twitching, an suffocating, as mother just stares
The neighbors question what smells like shit, but dad says “it’s none of your business”
Meanwhile the whole family is sitting by keyhole peaking
Seeing me all laid out on the floor with slit wrists leaking
Mother gives the poor booboo a kiss, hello-kitty Band-Aid, and “all better” she insists
I don’t think the hospital nurse liked me too much
She put all my meds in her purse and even stole my crutch
When I said I had to piss she told me to just go in the sink
An used the same tap water when I asked for a drink
I’m gonna prove to everybody that I can fly
Sure, I may fall to my death a moment after
But for just one split second I’ll close my eyes
And hear nothing at all but everyone’s laughter
This knife helps me deal with life’s pain
I’m just a lab-rat for the shrinks to observe
To see my reaction when I think I hit a nerve
Never mind, I keep cutting, “it was just a vein”
By my red stained bed frame lay two buckets of blood donations
They tell me the gift is an abomination; they explain the “truth”
That it’s immoral. So what else is given by our nation’s youth
Well most boys can fill two buckets from masturbations
Medication in my veins and leaking from my gashes
And the survival rate is low with pupils this dilated
Vitals are failing fast and my life is passing in flashes
If you wanted me alive you shouldn’t have waited
After I hug my ugly imaginary friends in my head, I flick off the nightlight
And let the bedbugs bite me, bite me up from my thighs
Like in the outside world I’m eaten alive, without even putting up a fight
I’m dead only when the light leaves, light leaves my eyes
After I’m found laid out on the ground dead
The officials tell my parents what their source said
I was last seen with my lost dog and a brain full of lead
But all they care about is if the damn puppy has been fed
Forensics says I was sick in the head
Proven by the cum stains in the bed
A note saying “I’m not dead, it’s just a trick”
And a separate noose hanging from my dick
There’s too much depending
On a life that’s never ending
Like when your suicide note’s status is “sending”
And the mass suicide has ten thousand attending
I couldn’t predict how people would react
Turns out the girl I loved was a necrophiliac
In my casket she gave my lifeless body one last kiss
Love and death, you can cross both off my to-do list
In the finale, when all of the rights have gone wrong
And whatever the time is, is just too late
The fat lady would be singing her song
But she killed herself after she couldn’t lose weight
Medication in my veins and leaking from my gashes
And the survival rate is low with pupils this dilated
Vitals are failing fast and my life is passing in flashes
If you wanted me alive you shouldn’t have waited
