Jesus Christ...

Jessieateyourbabies's picture

Jesus Christ...

It's been a few months since I posted a blog here. So, hello everyone, are you well? Yes? No? Well I'm not. The day before yesterday, I had my first anxiety attack. I have social anxiety, and I had to talk on the phone. My mom knew I can't do that, but instead of, oh I dunno, being supportive, and helping me through it, she got mad at me. She didn't even check to see if I was okay. I went to my room crying and hyperventilating, and my mom didn't give a flying fuck. She just shook her head at me and said, "If you can't make a phone call, how are you supposed to function in the real world?" I don't fucking know! Hopefully without you! I was terrified, I couldn't breathe, I was sobbing, and she was mad at me. She was disappointed in me. And I was mad at me too, because it was just a phone call that lasted about a minute, and I had a full-blown anxiety attack. Thankfully, my brother and sister checked on me to see if I was okay, which I wasn't, but I was thankful for them. Then my mom came to make sure I wasn't cutting myself. I was offended because she said, "I just don't want you slicing up your arm." And she said it with so much venom, like I was nothing but a big disappointment to her, and I am. I'm nothing like my wonderful brother and sister. I try not to let it get to me, but it's hard. Okay, sorry for the party-pooper of a post.
-xx
J