I don't know why, and that's what makes it worse. I don't know if I'm actually feeling this or if it's a subconscious cry for attention and I'm only paying attention because I'm a bit of a hypochondriac. Maybe I am feeling this and I'm just overanalysing it because I'm a bit of a hypochondriac.
The only bad thing that's actually happened today is that I went to meet M and he wasn't there, and I've not had a text off him all day. But I managed for fifteen years without anyone to talk to. Nobody wants to talk to me that badly, considering how I'm not in contact with pretty much everyone from my primary school - I don't think I've seen my 'best friends' in five years.
But anyway, I digress. I just feel like nothing. People will say funny stuff, and I will laugh at it, but then all the funny just goes away and I feel like . . . I dunno. Like if you run a bath but you don't put a plug in. Because of how fast you're pouring the water in, it looks like it's filling up, but the plug is still open and after a few moments all the water drains away and the bath is empty again.
A asked me if I was alright, and my Critical Thinking teacher did as well. But how can I answer if I don't know? I'm not ill - nobody I care about is ill that I know of. I'm not stressed about exams because I've finished with the maths, and I'm not stressed about family life because I've not been anywhere near my dad and his coven. I have no reason to be like this, and yet I am.
