Damn this song, in every way, is perfect. Just wow.... I think this song might be my favorite off of CW so far (might, mind you) :p I seriously have been listening to it ever since Mimi told me to earlier this morning. I should have looked it up when I woke up from (take a wild fuckin guess) another nightmare (*and confetti falls from the ceiling because we ALL know you were correct*) ugh....I'm sorry about the horrible sarcasm. Its getting pretty bad as I have more and more of these, but I'm just sort of sick of them....so mine from last night, idk why anyone really cares, But anyways. I'm in a bed in what I think was an asylum or hospital. My hands and legs were locked to the table, and all over my body are nip/tuck plastic surgery lines. (Yeah so my nightmares have gotten a ton more technical fyi.) and my eyes were pure white. My skin was pale and blotchy. Suddenly, my friend appears, accept her eyes are black. Pitch black. As well as my other friend, who walks in behind her with his pair of scissors and she had a gas mask on. Idk. But she did.
He takes the scissors and inserts them, hard, into my face. Blood just... drains from my skin onto the floor. My white eyes are like...going nuts. And bloody tears fall from them. I scream this.... howl almost. I think I must have been demon or something. I did have a cross on my head. Like the satan one? Yeah. Anyways, the blood started to cover up the floor completely, and soon there was about 3 inches on the floor. It just kept coming and coming and.... she took off her mask and kissed my cheek. and said "time to wake up" and he kisses my other cheek and laughed this...just horrible laugh. Just so everyone's aware, this isn't the first dream I've had with him in it, with black empty eyes and a haunting laugh and wanting me dead and gone. This is just one of many. But they look at eachother and then they cut my face up more, and the room starts flooding with my blood. They start to kiss eachother. while I'm screaming like a maniac. When the blood got to my mouth I panicked and tried to cough it away, and I ended up drowning in it....
and that's when I woke up. At 3:27. Coughing and crying and holding back a scream so I wouldn't wake anyone up. I had to stop myself from texting/calling Mimi or Matthew, because well, its 3:27. What were they supposed to do. Anywhooooo when she texted me today, and she told me about this song, and she told me some of the lyrics, I felt a ton better. Not only with Gerard's voice, but the things she said, it just made me feel sort of.... not alone through my weird nightmare phase that won't go away and spare me the depressed feelings or nightly tears or the hyperventilation of childish nonsense that I shouldn't have as a freshman in high school.
I want tattoos. Lots of them. I love gore, horror, and not a single horror movie has yet scared me. Not a one. Sure they're creepy, but its not easy for me to be scared by such things. I've been in s*xual instances and kept my cool, and I've been through heaven and hell. But nightmares can make me fall in reverse from only 7 months ago, to years and years and years.
And it sucks.
But I'm happy I have Gerard and Mimi at my side.
With every passing day, I'd be lying if I didn't say,
That I miss them all tonight... And if they only knew what I would say,
If I could be with you tonight...I would sing you to sleep,
Never let them take the light behind your eyes...One day, I'll lose this fight...
As we fade in the dark, just remember you will always burn as bright
Be strong, and hold my hand. Time becomes for us, you'll understand.
We'll say goodbye today, And we're sorry how it all ends this way...
If you promise not to cry, then I will tell you just, What I would say
IF I COULD BE WITH YOU TONIGHT,
I WOULD SING YOU TO SLEEP,
NEVER LET THEM TAKE THE LIGHT BEHIND YOUR EYES.
I'LL FAIL AND LOSE THIS FIGHT,
NEVER FADE IN THE DARK
JUST REMEMBER THAT YOU WILL ALWAYS BURN AS BRIGHT
