At the end of the world...

I was right in saying that I wouldn't be going to class. I woke up halfway through. But on the up-hand, I actually slept from 2-10. I forced myself to eat a sandwich for lunch and then showered. I spent a good hour after my deliciously toasty shower getting dressed and primped. I didn't intend to do this; it just felt good to take the time to make myself look presentable. I ended up wearing my new black sundress I originally got for Mexico with a headband with a checkered bow attached. I did straighten my hair, but with all the moisture in the air, it decided to go wavy. But I actually didn't mind so much. It actually did a controlled wave, so it looked quite pretty.

I felt awkward though. I mean, I haven't worn a dress since sometime last summer. Before then, I hadn't worn a dress since my graduation the year before. But a number of people told me I looked adorable, so I guess it was ok. I even got a "Wow."

I've discovered this is a coping method I've just developed. Taking the time to look nice takes my mind off of things. The makeup helps to make me look alive. It even makes it believable when I say that I'm ok....so believable that even I think it might be true.

Being around so many awesome people also helped. I think there was about nine of us at dinner. Do you know how many intriguing conversations there are when nine people are involved? We covered from Spongebob to dead bodies in the basement (I don't really know what that one was about..I just heard "dead bodies in the basement."). I quoted a line of adult humor from Spongebob ("It's that time of the month.") and actually snorted when I laughed. It was great. Everyone laughed and I was told that they wanted me to laugh more to hear it again. I managed to hold it in. After dinner, most of us played Beatles Rock Band. For the most part, I kicked major butt on expert. I even gave tips on how to incorporate the orange button. After a while, we went to the theater only to find the movie was sold out. And of course we had chosen the last showing. Then again, the only other showing was starting shortly after we were leaving the restaurant. Some more people went home and five of us watched Zombieland. There were some parts that were funny...I mean, I did laugh. It's just not really my type of movie. I doubt I'll ever see it again.

I do have to say that one of my coworkers is kind of cute. I sort of thought so last semester, but I'd never said more than hi to him before. He tall, wears glasses, has mousy light brown hair, and blue eyes. I found out that he and I have quite a bit in common. And he absolutely loves kitties. The craziest thing? I was able to joke around with him very easily. I don't know if it was just because I was surrounded by my crazy friends, but I was playful. I poked a bit of fun at him, as did he to me. We both rocked out hardcore to Rock Band (he's the one I gave the advice to...he was very impressed that I could play on expert. He himself was transitioning to hard). He was one of the people who told me I looked adorable. Then again, I'm not sure it really counted. I say that because my friend Jessica thought that I was talking about feeling awkward because I was in a dress and she told the other three people currently in the room to tell me I look adorable. He said it, but he wasn't looking at me...and his tone was a bit flat, as though he was annoyed by the topic. Then again, his tone might have been because he was concentrating on setting up the Xbox. I dunno. We did have a bit of one one one time outside the theater though. The others were getting tickets for tomorrow night and he and I stood outside in the snow. We talked (I can't really remember what about) as we looked up into the falling flakes. Naturally I started to feel a bit dizzy after a while and nearly fell sideways. We both laughed. If we happen across each other at work, I'll be sure to say more than hi to him. He also said he'd love to hang out more with our group of friends (us librarians gotta stick together, you know). So there will definitely be other chances to talk. I'm not sure if I'm ready to like someone new though. I guess I'll just have to see what happens. But what is it they say about dating a coworker? Don't?

Overall, I'd have to say tonight's "Operation: Heal" went surprisingly well. It also helps that I'm going home tomorrow. I feel as though my fall down the rabbit hole has begun to slow down.