Update I guess

Crushed Dreams's picture

Update I guess

I never come on here anymore... I used to know and recognize all of you guys but I'm so out of touch everyone is new to me. Most of you probably don't know me and all my friends are probably gone... I'll update I guess.

So. Love. It sucks I know, you know, we all know, and I'm becoming a sophomore in high school now. I thought I had everything figured out. I didn't. I really like two girls. One lives in Texas. The other is in school with me but is going to be a senior next year. And they both like me back. I don't know how to decide. The one in Texas said she doesn't want a relationship with me because we're so far apart. The one in my school, I'm pretty sure, just wants to fool around with me and nothing more. While all this is happening I have to keep away my guy friend who keeps coming onto me. I don't know how to choose. I know I should choose the girl in my school but I don't want to break the other's heart.

Another thing is I think I might be bigender. I don't know. I really don't. Awhile ago I realized how much I loved acting like a guy. Ever since I was little I loved it. I love pleasing women and being a gentleman. I like living a double life. I used to have multiple accounts online as guys and girls and flirt with the opposite gender, but the only one people liked were my guy accounts. Recently I've wanted to get a guy's haircut. When I go out cosplaying and dressing in costumes I always want to be a guy character. I love how I look as a guy and I love acting that way.

I don't know what I'm doing with my life. I really don't. I'm a mess and I have no direction.

XOXO
Matty