Attention Seeker

I think I have a subconscious urge to get help. If I didn't why would I continually post these blogs? I don't know what I'm hoping to achieve. Maybe to see if there is good left in the human race?
Compared to others, my life is a breeze, but my mind just crushes all my hopes, dreams and everything to dust. Every good thought I have I turn into a stupid idea. And I'm sick of EVERYONE.
I CAN'T DO THIS ANY MORE.
I'M A FAILURE.
I SCREW UP EVERYTHING.
I want this life to end, but won't do anything about it.
The worst thing is it's me making me feel like this. If it was someone else making me feel like this, it would be so much easier.
I need help...but I don't know where to turn.
Music doesn't give me the hope it used to, but it's all I got, and I guess it does cheer me up, but at the same time it generates the hate that kills me.
I wish I had someone, who knew it wasn't ok, and just...I don't know
Maybe this is just my subconscious attention seeking.
I should probably be ignored for my own good because I'm not the only one out there who needs help