Is it best?

Is it best for me to have loved then not loved at all?...Was it worth losing the one I trusted in an instint?...all because I was blind to see the lie that was infront of my face. I am only 16 an I know that I am still young for love but I should atleast have that high school romance. I don't understand whats wrong with me. I only blame myself cause I know I am not worthy of love. I know thats the last thing thats going to happen to me. *sigh* might as well keep putting on a fake smile that I have been pulling off for years...when summer comes I will think of ways to leave this earth. I know I am worthless here so why the fuck stay right? Hehe...^_^' (I have no life at all)

~FakeSmiles