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Sad at camp

Hey MCRmy,
I can have my phone at camp, as it turns out. This is because CIT's are concreted staff. I've also tried to post like four blogs but the wifi sucks so it doesn't work.
I'm with the same kids as I was last year (LIT summer). There's 17 of us. At the very end of last year, like the last week, I started to talk to them. But over the year my relationship with them has really faded. Now only two or three kids will really talk to me. These kids are Taylor, Marie-Amiee (French girl) and either Emmaline or Clara. The never laugh at my jokes, they won't actually have a good conversation about something I'm interested in. I'll say something openly to the whole cabin, like I'll say that I'm upset that My sneakers and rain boots are messed up. Or I'll offer the cabin Nutella and they won't even respond.

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Today's the day

Hey guys,
Today's the day. In about an hour I'm on the road for a three hour drive to New Hampshire, Lake Winnipesaukee (check it out it's freaking gorgeous). This year I'll get to assist/teach leather craft!!!! I love leather craft, in the boy's dining hall, there's an attic thing where leather craft meets. It's wicked hot, but I wish you all could smell it there. It smells hot, it smells dusty, it smells like dye, it smells like leather. I'm not the only vegetarian who loves leather craft though. Fork, the counselor (that's what everyone calls her) is the same way haha :).
I'll get tons of pictures and everything. And I'll write about it when I get back.
I hope you all have a great rest of summer, Message me if you want, be back in 5 weeks!
Keep smiling <3
xoxo
- Z

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I wish it was like it was before

I was just looking at the old website on this website that lets you view and use websites with past formats. Then I started watching videos from 2003. It made me miss them so bad. On their old website, they were posting all the time about shows. Gerard was advertising a "21+ album release show, grab your bat repellant and your eyeliner." They were also advertising an "MCR street team." I wish that they still interacted with us like that, when they were still a new band and figuring stuff out. I really like their earlier albums (bullets and three cheers) because they were much heavier and darker. I wish I could have been into them then, but I was 5. Do you think the MCR boys read our posts? I feel like they're ignoring us, sure Gerard tweets but they don't take the time to nCOMMUNICATE or to let us know how they're feeling. On the old website, they posted blogs that had actual meaning. It makes me really sad to see how they don't really work with us like they used to.

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J. Again.

I’m kind of freaking out. It probably sounds like no big deal. But to me, it’s everything. I was scrolling around Facebook today, when I saw someone I’ve been trying to forget. It was under the “recommended friends” or something like that. The profile picture was of a hooded kid with super thick eyeliner and a Chelsea grin drawn on his face with red lipstick. The name read “Ben St Pierre.” It was him. J. J had made a new Facebook. He changes his name a lot. When I met him, it was Alysa, then Al, then Jason, then J, then Bert, and now Ben. But I always stuck with J for some reason. Anyways, I blocked his old Facebook after a short conversation in which I told him how much he hurt me, how much I missed him, how much I love him, and How I was pissed that what he taught me landed me in the hospital, to which he replied “sorry.” That’s all he would say?

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Movie soundtrack challenge

YOUR LIFE AS MOVIE [SOUNDTRACKS]

So here's what you do;
1.Go to your music player
2.Put it on shuffle
3.For each scene, press the next button and so on.
DON'T CHEAT!!

Here's what I got;

Opening credits:
House of wolves - Bring Me The Horizon

Waking up:
Hell Above - Pierce The Veil

First Day of school:
Injection - Rise Against

Fighting:
You're So Creepy (acoustic) - Ghost Town

Breaking Up:
Dr. Doctor (acoustic) - Ghost town

Prom:
Diamonds aren't forever - Bring Me The Horizon

Life is good:
Men Are All The Same - The Used

Mental Breakdown:
Vices - Silverstein

Driving:
Dizzy - Jimmy Eat World

Flashback:
Rollar Costar - Blind-182

Making Up:
Demons - Mayday parade

Wedding:
Born To Quit - the used

Birth Of Child:
Three Hours Back - Silverstein

Night before war:
keep the change you filthy animal - All Time Low

Fin
wow, my movie would be pretty hard core.
xoxo
-Z

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XxstraightkjacketxX

I always wonder, when you grow up and you’re famous, will you talk to me? If I come to a meet and greet, and I say “Hey, remember me? It’s Z.” will you smile at me then the way you smile at me now? This probably sounds like a really stupid concept, but I can’t stop thinking about it. I Don’t want us to be nothing. Friendships fade, but I don’t want you to leave me. My biggest fear is what if by the time I have the money to fly out and see you, you’ll have forgotten me. I know I sound pathetic right now. It’s just that You’re the best thing in my life right now.
xoxo
- Z

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Going to camp

Camp starts on July 20th. That's 6 days!!! I will be a CIT at Pleasant Valley Camp. I'm so excited! This will be my fourth year at PVC, and I'm so happy to start giving back to my camp. CITs have more responsibilities than campers. Like we have to do all the dishes, sort the mail, and we have to watch the campers when the councilors go to meetings. I was nervous at first at being a CIT, because of the ugly CIT completion, which is when the campers put on "ugly" makeup and clothes on the CIT's. Then they give the CIT an ugly personality to teach the kids that there's more to ugly than looks. It's really fun. I keep reminding myself of how much fun it was when I was a camper, and how much fun it will be for them.
I will be gone for 4 weeks. I'll be thinking of all of you, hope you have a good rest of summer!
xoxo
- Z

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Hey guys!

Hey all,
sorry I haven't been on for a while. But I'm back! I'm going off to camp on the 20th. I'll be a CIT, so that's exciting.
In response to StraightJacket's blog, you saw that I took a screen shot of all the snapchats you sent me where you weren't wearing makeup. You know why? Because you're beautiful. You're the most beautiful person I have ever laid eyes on and I am not kidding. You are the reason I keep going.
I hope everyone is having a good summer, I'm going to a therapeutic school in september, I'nm happy about this and hopeful that this year will go ok.
lots and lots of love, MCRmy
xoxo
- Z

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the gender machine

heres a poem i wrote hope you enjoy :)
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The washing machine goes round and round. The colors blend together. The funny thing about the washing machine, is the colors are my gender.
I wish I had sorted my colors out many years ago. Because now a days, all you can say, is it’s a phase, that I don’t know.
Maybe it’s true, that I don’t have a clue if I’m green or red or blue. But may I ask why? Do I have to try? I’m simply a beautiful freaking rainbow.
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xoxo
-Z

chpeverill-conti's picture

the gender machine

heres a poem i wrote hope you enjoy :)
-----------------------------------------------------------
The washing machine goes round and round. The colors blend together. The funny thing about the washing machine, is the colors are my gender.
I wish I had sorted my colors out many years ago. Because now a days, all you can say, is it’s a phase, that I don’t know.
Maybe it’s true, that I don’t have a clue if I’m green or red or blue. But may I ask why? Do I have to try? I’m simply a beautiful freaking rainbow.
-----------------------------------------------------------
xoxo
-Z