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past week has been a bit of a blur

I dunno I can't really keep up with what day it is at the moment (after checking my computer clock, it's Friday, I have work at 9 tomorrow. shit) I was hanging out with friends the other day, we went to the park and did a load of stuff, and it was interesting, they were all drinking loads too, but I'd drank way too much the night before and spent the day puking (lovely, I know) So I didn't drink, I just did the other stuff. It was funny, and we ordered pizza, there was a massive storm outside and we stood in the road smoking and watching it. It was really pretty and relaxing. eventually we went to bed, I curled up on the chair and at one point this really weird feeling came over me. it was like my body felt like it just dropped, even though i didn't move, and it kinda felt like something left me, it felt as though I was floating but i couldn't move. I'm trying not to say 'like' too much, but basically i felt like i was weightless but weighted.

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can't believe what i did on the weekend, fuck.

I went out on Friday and we went to some club in North London, and it was a pretty good club, the drinks were expensive though.

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kinda worried but excited

it's my friends birthday next week, we're going to a gig and then back to a hotel for her party, I'm super excited, but kinda nervous, we're getting 2 bottles of whiskey, a bottle of absinthe (like 60-80% alcohol volume) and probably some "other stuff" too, stuff that isn't pot, although there'll probably be some of that as well, and as much as I'm excited to try it all, I'm scared we won't leave the hotel in one piece, haha, maybe I'm just overreacting, but a friend of mine who used to do "other stuff" all the time has strongly warned against it, and he did it for like 2 years or more...So Idk, maybe I'm just being silly, but I'm super nervous about casually dying at this party. I know I don't have to do it, but part of me wants to, Idk what to do.

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i leave education forever now...

i fucking finished my college education today, i've got a diploma in photography now and i'm desperate to be a concert photographer, iw will do it, i swear. we had an exhibiiton at college, omg when you're standing in a room and people are looking at your work, touching it, talking about it, it's horrible, it's like you've beared your soul to these strangers who don't care or understand, i got annoyed when people walked right past it, but i got scared when they stopped and looked at it, i was mostly therefor the free wine, then afterwards we went to the pub and we also smoked drugs in a multi story car park, and really i am so fucked right now but it's my last day of education and i'm so excited omg. i've had way too much to drink, everythign's fucked.

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I met gerard way!!!!!

YES! I actually met Gerard Way! It was amazing!!!! My friends and I went to the kerrang awards, and i drew him a picture, it was a picture of him on a really colourful watercolour background, with the words "flips of police, skateboards into hell" on the side, and he signed it, it was amazing, he said it was awesome, i took a photo of him holding it, but he's not looking at the camera, you might have seen it, it's a really recent photo :) that day in general was amazing and i can't believe we met him! he's so lovely c: i just wish we could've spoken for longer :') besides that aweosome fucking day, i've just been drinking, i've been drinking all day today, and my crush got with this prettier skinnier girl in front of me, and then they went back to his, myfriend's assuring me nothing will happens and that he likes me, but i'm not so sure, she's really pretty and skinny and confident, and i'm like a sentient potato.

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waheeeyy

the last two weekends have been spent in alleyways with bottles of whiskey in one hand, and a joint in the other and i feel awesome but really tired and kinda like i'm melting into the sofa, i'm going to a party tomorrow night and i wanted to talk to this guy earlier but i was too scared. he's really nice though.

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these past few days have been great, i'm so happy atm.

These past few days have been amazing, it's a bank holiday weekend, and on Saturday I went to go hang out with a friend of mine, he's lovely, I've known him for over a year now and we talk loads, but yeah we were hanging out on the beach eating sandwiches, and it was really warm and nice, and then we went back to his and played video games, and every so often he'd tackle me onto the bed or floor and tickle me/wrestle, it sounds weird the way I'm writing it, but it was kinda cute, and yeah I hung out there for a few hours, his mum's lovely too, she bought us crepes and popcorn, and then I got home and he Skyped me for like 3 hours while we were on Xbox, and even when I pointed out it was 3am, he was like "It's fine we can just sleep all day tomorrow" Idk I felt wanted :') And then on Sunday I met up with 3 friends of mine, and we hung out in alleyways and carparks and did the usual, drinking, smoking pot, buying food, it was really awesome, though I'm a bit fuzzy on remembering what we

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i used to post like once a week but now not so much

i used to post here like once a week but no one ever read them so i gave up. uhm yeah what happened lately. i met up with some friends tonight and one of them was like "i have coke on me" and i was like "what coca cola?" and he just looked at me, and yeah then i caught on, he offered me some, and i was reallly reaally tempted, i wanted to just say yes, but idk i've seen pulp fiction, so i said no, maybe next time, maaybe. but yeah we went to this pub and i had a few drinks and then my friend with the coke said he was going home so i left too, but halfway home, i was kinda drunk, i decided i didn't wanna go home, so i went into anohter pub alone and bought a few strong but overpriced jack daniels and cokes there, and then i felt pleasently buzzed, and walked home and got a drink out the fridge, i can't really feel my face or hands so it's just another friday (?) saturday (?) night. this is just a crappy little update i maybe be back in a week or two idk.

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haven't been on in a while, i'm not dead yet i promise sorry

i haven't been on in a while, it's monday and i went out tonight with my friends and we drank a lot, i bought lots of vodka + cokes and whiskey and yeah i had an amazing time but i have college tomorrow and we have an important meeting. fuun. my friend was trying to get me to go back to his house tonight and i was really tempted but i said no, 'cause i'm a responsible fucking drunk. this post isn't really going anywhere it's just it's been a while and yeah i just figured if anyone cared to know that yeah i'm still around and kickin'. just. tonight was fun but i wish we'd stayed longer, didn't get nearly drunk enough, i was pretty drunk but not enough as i'd hoped. it was fun though, hopefully we'll all meet up again soon. :)

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wowowow fuuucccked.

my friend came over about 12 hours ago and we did a shoot for my college project, and then we went to get food and partake in casual drug use, it sounds more sophisitacted like that i think, and yeah then we pre drank for tonight, i didn't have much, but together we got through half a bottle of vodka, and then we got to the pub and i had jack daniels and coke, was kinda awkward 'cause my ex was there and i get nervous drinking around him, but it was fine, and then my friend and i were intending to leave when everyone wernt to the club, but we ended up joining them, i had like maybe 10 drinks and some shots at the club and then we were sitting on the train station waiting for the last train home and my friend said we should go to the end of the platform and finish the rest of the shit we were taking at the start of the day, and i said no 'cause like it's a fucking train station and i didn't wanna be arrested for using at a fucking train station wating for the last fucking train, but an