Zankoku_sinner's blog Syndicate content

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Fall Asleep...

That is what I feel like doing right now. There's a lot of things I should be doing... studying for my test, finishing the comic adaptation of Soldier On (that's a Shingeki no Kyojin fanfiction), reading my books, meditating, learning to play chess... but all I really feel like doing right now is going to sleep and just never waking up again, though I know eventually I'll have to.

Maybe meditating will help. I need to do so more often, anyway.

Depressing shit over. Carry on, Killjoys.

xoxo Tric

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Quick update and stuff

Okay, so instead of something long-winded and philosophical/angsty like I would usually write, I'm just going to establish myself as still being a member of this lovely fanbase with some updates.

- I've been on a bit of a music binge recently. Shiny new albums I have blown my money on the past month include: New Life (Modern Day Escape), Scripted and Icon For Hire (Icon For Hire xD), Three Cheers For Sweet Revenge (guess :p), Save Rock and Roll (Fall Out Boy), 20th Century Masters: The Best of Aerosmith, as well as three individual songs: Centuries (Fall Out Boy), Under The Gun, and The Syndicate (Modern Day Escape). With hopefully more to come.

- I go to trucking school now. I'm not particularly excited about it, and I'm only really there because my mother is still obsessed with me driving, but at least it gives me an excuse to leave the house.

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Fall Out Boy and some other crap

Okay, so I've been listening to Centuries pretty much on repeat lately. I don't know what it is about this song... it puts me in mind of all the emotional development that I've been undergoing for no reason for the past few months. It helps that the music is amazing and that Patrick just sounds great. (It also helps that the video is set in Chicago. I've only been there once, en route to Indiana when we were first moving here, but it reminds me a lot of New York, where I was born and raised. I love the place way more than an introverted loner probably should.
Anyway, yeah, Centuries kicks ass. Anybody else liking this song? Cause I know I'm going to be obsessed with it for a while.
As for the other crap... I've been on somewhat of a classical music kick lately. In particular, Moonlight Sonata, first movement. Damn that song is pretty.

... actually, come to think about it, that's it. Catch you later Killjoys.

xoxo Tric

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Ah shit...

Mikey's birthday completely slipped my mind! Fucking school and fucking studying with fucking overemotional parents and fucking homophobic ghosts...

Anyway! Happy Birthday one Michael James Way! Who I fully realized today is almost my doppleganger. (Our personalities are pretty similar.) Have a good rest of your birthday!

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Some of my answers make me sound like an asshole. I probably am.

1. Real Name? Amber-Courtney

2. If you could change your name? Abigail-Muteki

3. Obsessions? Attack On Titan, music, Levi

4. Male or Female? Female

5. Elementary School? Great up until about third grade.

6. Middle School? - Shitty

7. High School? - Fucking shitty

8. Want to go to college? Started four days ago. So far it's shitty, my mom ruined it. XD

9. Natural Hair color? Sort of off-black or something

10. Tall or Short? Short

11. Sweats or Jeans? Both

12. Phone or Camera? Both

13. Health Freak? I eat chocolate chips for breakfast.

14. Orange or Apple? Apple... delicious

15. Do you have a crush on someone? Levi <3

16. Eat or Drink? Both, eathing without drinking will kill you

17. Ever broken a bone? No

18. Pepsi or Coke? Pepsi

19. Been in an airplane? Plenty

20. Been in a relationship? Twice

21. Been in a car accident? April. Scary

22. Caused a fight? Ladies never start fights. They finish them.

OTHER THINGS

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Guess who's back, back again...

Tric is back, tell a friend...

Eminem lyric appropriation aside, as of today, I am 24 years and 15 days old. And yet I am still short and look like I am only 15 years old. Being short blows.

Zankoku_sinner's picture

I just feel like talking...

As the title says, I am just going to ramble on like the emo young adult that I am, for the sole purpose of wanting to talk. It will be a confessional and, maybe, an update. But mostly just depressing. XD

As much as I hate to admit this, as much as I wish I could say that I'm strong and independent and I don't need anybody and I could live as a hermit... I get lonely sometimes.

Yes, it's true. It doesn't happen often-- I'm generally quite content by myself-- but when it does happen, it's painful. Draining. Sometimes I go numb and can't even think.

This is part of why I haven't been on in a few weeks. That numbness, that emptiness that I can't fill no matter what I do. That darkness that makes me so lethargic that I can't even listen to music. I simply cannot find the strength to put my headphones in my ears and turn on a song. So I sleep alone.

Zankoku_sinner's picture

It's National Blow Shit Up Day again! ^_^

Yes, I know that's not what the holiday is about, but it's the most fun part and it's what everybody does. xD I actually threw some snappers at my wall today... so cathartic. <3 Funny thing is, when I bought them, I had to show my ID. :S Back in New York, they sold these things to little kids all the time in grocery stores.
Anyways, hope everybody's having a good day, whether or not you live in America and this holiday exists for you. <3 Listen to lots of music and eat good food!

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Blood Is Thicker Than Water, But They Both Leak. Trust No One.

I'm sure the title and the video seem a bit mismatched, but in a couple of paragraphs, you'll know.

My mom's been back to calling me a piece of shit lately. She never used those exact words, but she has her little ways of putting me down. She treats me like I'm her enemy.

And you know what? Fuck it. She wants an enemy, she's got one.

I refuse to keep being put down. I know what I am. No more believing the bullshit story she's made up about me in my head.

Keep it ugly, junkpunks.

xoxo Tric

Zankoku_sinner's picture

Looks like I still have some growing up to do...

A really long-winded, character-condemning confessional follows after this text. If you're not in the mood for long-winded confessionals, do not read anything after this symbol: ~**~ Instead, enjoy this short story that I literally just made up for your reading pleasure. ^_^

Once upon a time, a young man decided that he wanted to travel the world. He had no money to do so, since he worked a minimum wage job, but still he was determined to try. He decided to run a fundraiser in order to obtain enough money to fulfill his dream. However, no matter how hard he tried, no matter how much he promoted this fundraiser, still he could not get the money. He fell swiftly into a deep despair, refusing to speak to anyone or leave his home, except to go to work.
One day a knock sounded at his door. Begrudgingly, he opened the door to see who was there. It was an elderly woman with, not gray, but platinum blonde hair. "Yes?"